Steven

Stevens are generally cunts. They are highly opinionated of others and hold themselves in high esteem. It is common for the word 'arsehole' to be used colloquially for people named Steven. Stevens are typically forgetful, and struggle to listen to their significant others due to their all consuming self-interest. Stevens are tight arses but like to spend money on themselves. Statistically, people named Steven are more prone to delusions of grandeur. Apart from the negative vibes that people named Steven have throughout history given to the name, the name itself possesses mystical qualities. When we take the alphabet and extract the letter combination STUVWX a miraculous thing occurs. 1. As we know in mathematics, 'X' represents an unknown quantity. Therefore, we can substitute 'X' for 'N' giving it a known quantity. Thus, we produce STUVWN. 2. If we 'double the 'U' as the letter 'W' commands of us ("double u!"), we get STUUVWN. 3. When we turn the 'UU' and 'W' 90 degree's clockwise the name STEVEN appears. STEVEN is perhaps the most mystical name in the entire English language for this very fact. STUVWX - STEVEN This cryptogram was formulated alongside the development of Hidden Number Theory by a mystical sorcerer known only as STEVEN.