spitball

The most ingenious projectile weapon known to man. Commonly created by taking a small piece of paper that had been balled and moistened in the mouth, placing a thin tube to the lips (such as a plastic straw or broken pen), and blowing so that the projectile passes through the tube at a high velocity until impacting in a vivid display of saliva. Over the years, the spitball has become one of the greatest threats to teachers, school administrators, nerds, and obese girls everywhere. Attempts have been made to limit the spread of this dangerous weapon, but the spitball remains prevalent because of how easy it is to create, use, and conceal.