Slamtarded

The state of being so slammed drunk that one no longer acts with the full cognitive capacity of a normally functioning human being. The act of getting slamtarded often directly results in nights of unmatched glory as well as epic stories. Side effects include but are not limited to: fun, embarrassment, painful mornings, inability to control the volume of one's voice, loss of ability to speak coherently, and, in extreme cases, waking up with a woman you could have sworn was about 150 pounds lighter last night. Stated concisely: being so drunk that you have to hold onto the grass to keep from falling off the face of the earth.