Skimbleshanks

A ginger tabby alley-cat covered in curry and stuff. He is infested inside and out with every disease known to man. He meows like a bitch and growls at anything that moves. His tail always sticks up 90 degrees and shit flakes fly out his arse when he farts. His claws are like 9 inches long and make a bastard of a noise on hard ground. He climbs in through the window when you're out, finds the whitest carpet/piece of furniture and wipes his arse all over it, leaving lovely brown streaks everywhere. On his way out he steals some food.