Scorched Earth Party
It's happened to you, no doubt. You are somewhere public, trying to complete a simple task. Perhaps you are eating in a Dennys. Perhaps you are buying something at Costco. Perhaps you are just driving along on the highway. Then it happens: Some stupid moron causes a problem. They put their trivial life ahead of your own existence, and as a result they move, however briefly, from the position of 'faceless drone' to 'obstacle'. The waiter messes up your order. You can't get a refill of coffee because they're "too busy", despite the fact that the restaurant is empty. Some jerk cuts you off with their cart and there's no way around them now. That asshole who is coming up on your tail, flashing his brights, decides to cut around you on the right at about 90 mph just as you start signaling to get out of his way, and he honks wildly as though you're the one endangering everyone on the road. And you think to yourself: This person must die. The Scorched Earth Party is here to tell you: Yeah. Go for it. Here at the Scorched Earth Party, we are dedicated to a few simple principles: * that the concept of "life is sacred" is the best joke we've heard this year. * that nothing satisfies like clubbing some moron to death with a lead pipe. * that you can never get laid enough. * that the world will continue to deteriorate until 90% of its population is eliminated. True happiness will never be yours unless you rise up with us. Join the 10% with the lead pipes. Help save the world through random, messy violence, and then wallow in carnal pleasure among the ruins.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
ThIs is perfect
Great quality and fast shipping and I just dropped my mug.
This T-shirt is a high quality product. It fits perfectly and is very comfortable as well. I'm totally satisfied with the product and recommend it to everyone. Not to sound like a commercial or anything, but I really am impressed! Check it out for yourself. If you're thinking about buying something, go ahead. I'm sure I'll be buying more for a few friends soon. Thanks guys! I love this shirt! For real.
My niece laughed and loves her custom shirt.

Not only was the product exactly what I expected, I was well informed on the shipping process in a seamless and timely manner!
The T-shirt was a birthday gift for my girlfriend and she absolutely loved it.

Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
My wife absolutely loves her new T-shirt.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.
Absolutely wonderful product! I bought this shirt for my son and he gagged with joy! Mariah Careystmas everyone!
I love it I bought me and my family some
Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>
Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...
Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.
Another hit!
Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻
I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".
Very comfortable and love the tyoeface
Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |