Porch Beer
Here is the porch beer recipe. It can only be made in the summer. 1. Buy a bunch of Heineken. This is the raw ingredient necessary for the brew. No substitutions with quality beer allowed. 2. Put it in a cooler with ice and a bunch of other beer and a turkey/tomato/mayo/lettuce/Swiss wrap. Let part of the sandwich fall into the ice. 3. Leave the cooler on the back porch in the sun for a month. Do not drain the water or pick out the wrap. 4. Open the cooler, and clean everything up. Throw out all the other brands of beer and wash teh Heiny bottles under your backyard spigot to get the cap rust off and to clean off the botulism from what was the turkey wrap. 5. Line the beers up on the same bench you have the upended cooler drying out on. Ensure this location gets the sun/rain/wind, etc. 6. Leave beer in the sun for a month or more. 7. Put beer in fridge. 8. Drink and stand the fug back. Note: Author is NOT responsible for what happens to you, or those around you, your loved ones or your marriage. Author's stomach and intestines have been hardened by food poisoning in Turkey, by undercooked lamb and sheep testicles in South Africa, balut in the Philippines, swamp crawdads and by years of bad cooking. The novice porch beer maker with a Wonder bread stomach could be KILLED. May God have mercy on your soul.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
I love this t-shirt that says morbussy. It allows me to show off both my love for Morbius and the fact that I get no Morbussy.
This shirt feels great, perfect fit too.
Great looking t-shirt. Good quality. Printing looks good.
Cool I didn’t order anything I just have a lot of free time and not a lot of hobbies
Fun and soft.
Good stuff! Although, I do have a sneaking suspicion that this is cursed. You see, whenever i dawn this top-teir, soft, stylish shirt - I proceed to pass out within 46 seconds. The mere act of making contact with the material insues the process of this countdown starting. If I do not quit contact, i will lose conciousness the exact moment the countown hits 0. And when I regain clarity, I find myself in a bathtub - never mine, but a bathtub nevertheless. In the bathtub, there is always various colours of hairdye. I then have to go back home, shirt stained with dye. Very fashionable though! 10/10
Smooth transaction and nice product, shipping was quick!
good very good worth money!
5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious
10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again
Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.
gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
shirt made me cum
Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating
people shat on my shirt that said shart and im mad they took a shit on it instead of a shart
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |