Petroleum Popper

The Petroleum Popper is a move usually done on cute, adorable (and consenting) males with big, blue eyes and the most squeezable cheeks. To perform the Petroleum Popper, you need: - a wall - 1 large glass on raw honey - a Jakub - Petroleum - some dextrous fingers (3 is enough) And that’s it! First, find a suitable Jakub that fits the aforementioned description. Next, take your Jakub and strip any clothes off (after asking for consent of course). Then pour your raw honey over the entire Jakub, leaving no skin in the open air. An optional addition; you can pour a large dollop of honey down the crack for visual pleasure. Now, my favourite part! Throw that hunk of endearing, 2 beautiful buns babe at a large wall. Quick note, make sure the Jakub is facing away from you with arms and legs spread for easy access. Now do as you wish! I’ve noticed my Jakub perks up a little smile when I slap his buns silly and get my face all up in his chleba! When trying to stick large bad dragons into the behind of the Jakub, make sure to cover the tip to base in strawberry flavoured petroleum jelly. This goes for all Jakubs. Why so specific? I’m trying to find that out myself.