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optimistic dab

When a male urinates, then proceeds to dab the tip of his penis with a single square of toilet paper or something akin to a baby-wipe. This ritual is a crude, but slightly considerate, attempt at hygiene when the male is optimistic about receiving fellatio in the near future. Usually occurs when sex appears imminent but the male must excuse himself in order to urinate. The optimistic dab, while very similar to a full solar-eclipse in the fact that it is rarely seen, only becomes in evident in one of two common situations: 1. The male and his sexual partner reside in the same residence and the aforementioned male fails to know properly operate the bathroom door while urinating 2. When the male is beginning to receive fellatio and the female, while flicking her tongue across the head of his penis, realizes her partner's cock tastes like a wet-nap one receives in a BBQ restaurant. Thanks.

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The Urban Dictionary Tee

Soft, comfortable fabric
Printed on-demand just for you
True to size fit
Pre-shrunk (won't shrink in wash)
Tear-away label (no itchy tags)
Every order personally reviewed
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It is absolutely perfect and I love wearing it. Thank You.

Kathleen J.Feb 14
✓ Verified Purchase

Love the short mine says bih on it

Neal N.Feb 11

this shit stays on during sex

asas a.Feb 8

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Size Guide

Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!

T-shirt measurements

A - Length

Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem

B - Width

Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit

Size Chart

SizeLengthWidth
XS27"16½"
S28"18"
M29"20"
L30"22"
XL31"24"
2XL32"26"
3XL33"28"
SizeLengthWidth
XS69 cm42 cm
S71 cm46 cm
M74 cm51 cm
L76 cm56 cm
XL79 cm61 cm
2XL81 cm66 cm
3XL84 cm71 cm

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