nickel

A woman of low standing in terms of physical attractiveness. They are often the fodder for young intoxicated men also of marginal physical attractiveness, men of a high level of physical attractiveness who have either entered a state of desperation or incapacitation, or fallen wingmen. Much like operations in mathematics, the classification of a nickel is also bound by the laws that govern their existence; this law is know as Ethan's law, discovered by a strip club owner by the same name. Ethan's law states that a nickel must possess at least two of the following characteristics: a large waist, oblong/distorted face, facial hair, double chin of the arm, or pepperoni nipples. Although the term nickel is not the surname of this wily beast, it does provide the most succinct definition.