Malvern Prep

A lesser prep school. Known as Malvern, it is located in the middle of nowhere and is frequently the site of Amish mafia raids. Students of the school often arm themselves with weapons to protect against such attacks, but are more often too inept at physical action to move out of the way. When looking for a real prep school, students apply in massive numbers to the Prep School of champions, Saint Joseph's Prep. Located in Philly, the students need not weapons to protect themselves, for the school has professional ninjas hired permanently as bodyguards. Since all the talented people come to the Prep, it owns all other schools in academics and athletics. Parents, don't wuss out and send your child to a lesser school. Send your child where they deserve it. The Prep. Home of the Pirate Mixer, where there's twenty sexy girls who want to go all the way to every guy. Now that you know, don't make a mistake. Because knowing is half the battle.