Jizzy-Shit Paint
The concept of Jizzy-Shit Paint first appeared in a UN directive, aimed at providing an affordable and renewable source of paint for poorer nations. Scientists believed that a combination of whale semen and horse shit could be used to paint the walls of peoples homes at minimal cost. Plans were to create factories where the jizz and shit would be sucked out of the animals involved and emptied into large vats. However, when Kofi Annan got wind of the idea, he reportedly addressed the individuals involved with the line: "Damn, you motherfuckers are crazy, who's gonna want a house that smells of Whale Queef?!!"
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A - Length
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B - Width
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Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |