jeeter

The common red-necked Jeeter can be found sporting a worn agricultural product or automotive sports cap at a roadhouse bar, where a chain-link fence shields the questionable talent from bottle hurling locals. (the hat's foam printed front is a requirement, mesh back is optional). The Jeeter is usually scruffy, with at least a four-day beard and often twice as much growth sprouting from nostrils and ears. Skinny and with darting eyes, the Jeeter emerges from his dented and jacked-up Ford F-150, 85 Camaro or un-muffled Station Wagon, sun baked to perfection with fresh nicotine tarnish accenting his moustache and fingers. Look for the scraggly salt-and-pepper hair jutting out from beneath his cap on Northern Jeeters, and for Southern Jeeters, a longer mullet will often be present. The vocal laugh of the common Jeeter sounds like a bass note coming from a bleached dashboard speaker that has torn from its rim. Teeth are, of course, optional. Another mark of distinction is a nearly empty chain-to-belt wallet, and fingernails that look like the contain a 1/4 pound of driveway sealant. When seen entering a strip joint, the Jeeter wallet contains a surprising amount ot greasy, wrinkled $1 bills.