Italian

Victims of stupid Americans bastardizing their heritage to try and sound cool and/or tough. So-called "Italians" talk with fake Brooklyn accents, eat Chef Boyardee ravioli and Domino's Pizza, and keep the first three buttons of their shirts unbuttoned so as to expose unsightly, bristly black chest hair, often complemented by a gold chain necklace. Calls friends "paizan" or "gumba" and thinks phrases such as "Donde esta?" and "'Ey chico!" are Italian. Often claims ties to the mafia in whatever major city is closest to the suburb they live in. Usually feel the need to make proclaimations such as "Yo, I'm Italian!"