Iren

Name for a closeted party animal who somehow, when she has lost all motoric coordination, lands somewhere between a bucket and the porcelain throne. Her appearance is deceiving; she converses with classical musicians and frequently can be found in the local grocery store. However, once the shades are drawn and the lights are out, she will weedle her way into your bed if you are not careful. Refrain from being in any state of intoxication around said person; statistics show that there is a 9 in 10 possibility of being shot in a drive-by on 37th Drive while running nude in the street screaming "Iren!". Oh, and she's hot. And she has a nice ass.