International AFL

Form of AFL, also known as International Fagball. A term which refers to the sport and fraternity of Australian Rules Football outside of the Australian continent, as well as the tragic and laughable attempts of this commuinity to expand the game beyond the southern land. Governed and overseen by a lightweight organisation known as the International Australian Football Council (IAFC) which is widely famous for its extensive collection of funny photographs. Not to be mistaken with International Rules, an equally poor attempt to give AFL some level of international credibility. International AFL is played unprofessionally (see: Park Footy) in various global powerhouses such Narau, Denmark, Canada and Senegal. Denmark, home to the largest AFL premiership outside Australia, enjoys enormous levels of success with a reletively low ex-pat player percentage of 99.80% and the largest average attendences of any country in the world, excluding Australia, with a figure of 62. The thriving Pacific island of Narau (pop: 11,000) is also the only country on Earth where AFL is considered the national sport. Despite the fact that virtually every game of International AFL is played on open farm paddocks and at an inconceivably low standard, the usual AFL mannerisms are still present (see: Scrotum tasting, Arse banditry, Felching, Sausage party). Half-decent athletes are extremely scarce with obese, bald, uncoordinated shirtlifters seen as the norm. International AFL is often mistaken by AFL aficionados in southern Australia, primarily Victoria (see: Mexico), as a legitimate federation of participating nations which rivals various other particular sports on an international level eg. Rugby League. The most famous of International AFL teams is New Zealand's national side. Are known for their outrageously homosexual and insulting rendition of the "Haka". Members of New Zealand's home crowds are said to apparently pull out their pork swords and pleasure themselves during the rendition as a symbol of national unity and pride (see: 21-cum salute). Known priority International AFL expansion targets: - Djbuti - Siberia - Christmas Island - Greenland - Botswana