Howie
Former grandmaster of the universe. Once upon a time, in a mad quest for the perfect human, some scientist brought the single-celled common ancestor of life back from the past. Then he grew it, along with human stem cells, into Howie. Howie could do anything at all, he had complete control of the universe, and was a cruel grandmaster of everything. He could win a chess game in one move....he could spontaneously create life....and destroy an object of any mass with a roundhouse kick. He would often torture his subjects for sheer amusement. But he had one weakness....even he could not divide by zero. In order to prevent his power from being undermined, he created the asymptote to occupy this paradoxical place and keep people from getting into it. Then, one day, Howie spotted Stephen Hawking. He knew that he held the key to making his power absolute...so he extracted Hawking's motor cortex (that's why he's paralyzed) and used it to grow a brain for his new son, who was an exact clone of him. Once his son taught him how to divide by zero, he would merely dispose of him. This son was Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris inherited all of Howie's abilities, and began his studies of zero division. He found the answer after 3 months, 14 days, 1 hour, and 59 minutes. (Continued in example)
The Urban Dictionary Tee
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
shirt made me cum
Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating
people shat on my shirt that said shart and im mad they took a shit on it instead of a shart
Necero's shirt i can use this in almost every phrase. This shirt allows me to do some great stuff with my kids and grandkids! i'd love for anyone who says same to get this shirt!
Bad! Why is this T-shirt named shitty fucking??What a bad name it is!Recommend?Never!😡
The shirts are amazing! I will be ordering again. And recommend them to others 🙂
My UD shirts are my favorites. They fit well, last long, and are unique. I always have people reading my back.
Amazing This shirt is SOOOOO comfortable and I love the definition
BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME THIS IS THE BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME. LITERAL FUCKING HELL OF A PLACE HAS BECOME A PART OF MY EVERDAY VOCABULARY AND I RECOMMEND IT FOR ANYONE WHO IS FORCED TO SIT IN A PLACE THEY HATE FOR AN HOUR EVERDAY. GO BUY THE MUG, SHIRT, OR SWEATSHIRT NOW!
Awesome tshirt This tshirt is awesome but my name isn't actually Jayson but i bought it for his b-day
good is it very. i like shirt much,,,,, it contabfortable like it i do.
The Fucklix t shirt is perfect but I am still waiting for the xlarge I ordered. These are gifts and will be just what is needed. Hope I receive the xlarge soon then it's time to give them to the people I ordered them for. So glad I saw them . Thanks.
My wife loves it. Nice quality and so funny for the wearer. Thank you!
The shirt fit amazing, package was shipped rather fast! Thank you so much..
It is absolutely perfect and I love wearing it. Thank You.
Love the short mine says bih on it
Review Details
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |