Hotpocket
Not to be confused with Hot Pocket. A Hotpocket is a small, invasive species, closely resembling that of a bread-encrusted, cheese-filled delicacy. I regret to inform the readers of this article that this is not the case. The Hotpocket is not a food, it is an alien species of which we know very little. First I will start off by describing the anatomy of the Hotpocket. In one case, we dissected a specimen, and to our dismay, we found no headway in our research. This is because the Hotpocket does not possess any of the internals we would expect. No digestive system, circulatory or otherwise. Despite not having a reproductive system, they reproduce, despite not appearing to have reproductive organs. The offspring, as we would refer to them- Are pizza rolls. Now, based on the fact that a Hotpocket doesn't possess a reproductive system, and in the well-known herds of twelve that they travel in, having spotted no difference between any of them, we have assumed that they are all one gender, and reproduce asexually. It also appears that they have many offspring at once, supported by the fact that the Pizza Rolls outnumber Hotpockets by nearly tenfold. It is assumed that only a small number of Pizza Rolls survive to maturation. They seem to thrive in only cold conditions, as if left out they go soft, a sure sign that it's died. (Look for Part Two, couldn't fit all in character limit)
The Urban Dictionary Tee
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |