gum

An extremely vile and artificial substance that trashy slobs blindly ingest despite a lack of knowledge as to what gum contains. But perhaps the worst thing about gum is that the most religious gum chewers are the least able to chew like people. Instead, they must force decent people to listen to the moist sound caused by disgusting amounts of saliva that gum generates. These sounds are similar to that of a cow chewing it's cud, but this analogy may be imperfect because no sound will ever be as vile as the sound made when people chew gum.