God
A fire breathing duck-billed platypus currently living in a bag of Cheetos that can be purchased in a Fred Meyer grocery store in Eugene, Oregon. But if you buy that bag of Cheetos with God in it, God will relocate to a different bag of Cheetos before you can see what God looks like. There are two reasons for this. First of all, if we laid our eyes upon God, in all Her Glory, we would be unworthy and we would be consumed by the fires of justice that spring forth from Her Sacred Platypus Bill. The second reason God disappears from an opened Cheetos bag is because belief in God must be purely a matter of faith. God does not want us to see Her, for that would not allow us to make the leap of faith toward knowing Her and all Her Fiery Platypus Ways. Some say, however, that God should give us proof of Her divine existence. Even the holiest of Saints have cried out for a sign. Recall the words of St. Wallaby of Beaverton: “For if we are unworthy to see you, O Dear Platypus, can you not give us an earthly sign of your Fiery Bill?” Recall also the writings in Captain Kangaroo’s epistle to the Marsupials, where he pleads “breathe your Sacred Platypus Fire underwater, O Lord, so that we may see proof of your ability to defy nature!” But yea, St. Wallaby and Captain Kangaroo, have you not forgotten the words of Our Savior Herself? “Blessed are those who have not seen and still believe!” We cannot put God, Our Lady of Pendleton, to the test. For it was the Great Wallaroo of Portland who said that “the observance of Our Lady’s miracles are no different from the miracles of Our Lady herself.” In other words, seeing Her blessed miracles is no different than seeing the Most Holy Platypus in Her Holy Flesh, for then we cannot develop the faith by which we will know Her.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
5 out of 5 I love when people start reading the definition. It's halourious
10/10 yes much good 10/10 would buy again
Fit is true to size, good quality material. Graphics applied well (not off-center or angled as with some products). Quick shipment.
gooderesting the gooderesting thing ever made
Got it for a friend! He loved it
Size was accurate, and printed text was as displayed online. Doesn't hurt that the material is pretty soft either.
mine says "ass" on it lol
Good Decent, comfortable by all means
My wife bought this for me, my only thing about the shirt, is the big Vernon on the front. I think I would prefer it situated and smaller type as if overva pocket. Other than that I love it. Seems to be of good quality and easy wearability, but I have only tried it on, so am uncertain. Thank you for making my day
shirt made me cum
Dick Aww man I love this shirt for eating
people shat on my shirt that said shart and im mad they took a shit on it instead of a shart
Necero's shirt i can use this in almost every phrase. This shirt allows me to do some great stuff with my kids and grandkids! i'd love for anyone who says same to get this shirt!
Bad! Why is this T-shirt named shitty fucking??What a bad name it is!Recommend?Never!😡
The shirts are amazing! I will be ordering again. And recommend them to others 🙂
My UD shirts are my favorites. They fit well, last long, and are unique. I always have people reading my back.
Amazing This shirt is SOOOOO comfortable and I love the definition
BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME THIS IS THE BEST SHIRT OF ALL TIME. LITERAL FUCKING HELL OF A PLACE HAS BECOME A PART OF MY EVERDAY VOCABULARY AND I RECOMMEND IT FOR ANYONE WHO IS FORCED TO SIT IN A PLACE THEY HATE FOR AN HOUR EVERDAY. GO BUY THE MUG, SHIRT, OR SWEATSHIRT NOW!
Awesome tshirt This tshirt is awesome but my name isn't actually Jayson but i bought it for his b-day
good is it very. i like shirt much,,,,, it contabfortable like it i do.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |