Freedom Flu

Freedom Flu: A highly infectious disease carried by most Americans. Especially contagious to individuals outside of the US who have a prolonged stay within the US or overexposure to freedom. It can be as little as a few week before symptoms show or lay dormant for months before knowing. Symptoms Include but not limited to: Heavy Breathing, Weight Gain, Covering food in ranch dressing, cravings for all things fried or wanting to fry all things, urge to purchase a firearm, an itchy or muscle spasm in index fingers, beginning to understand and incorporate the imperial system, going to walmart just to have something to do, feeling the need to purchase a vehicle larger than your needs, increasingly growing opinions of the American Goverment System and more.