Football
A £ multi-billion industry based around 20 overpaid tribal heroes kicking a ball around, as in the grounds thousands of semi-evolved, illiterate grunting beasts attempt to kick the living shit out of eachother. These Mongo Retardopithicus footballii are tribal creatures, easily regognised by their sloping forheads, prominant brow-ridges, shaven heads, vulgar and garish gold sovereign rings and the finest chunky gold chains that Argos can supply as well as their tribal war-paint. They are a primitive people, who worship the Sun (especially page 3 ). Most are incapable of using words of over 2 sylables ( foot-ball, mon-go, rooo-knee, ga-zza, lar-gah, be'-kham ) the only exception being their legendary spiritual home, the mythical Ing-Gerr-Laaaand. Each tribe slavishly worshipping a tribal god-icon and it's associated 12 warrior- heroes,or 'Teeems. Usually, these tribes are blood enemies ( Chel-see tribe strong, kill Ars-nal tribe, ug! ) , fighting vicious battles over the ritualised tribal war carried out by the Teeems These battles invariably end up in local human population centres being damaged ( 'Mongo's Teeem is lose, Mongo smash up town, ug!' or, conversely 'Mongo's Teeem is win, Mongo smash up town, ug!' ) Every 4 years however, the tribes of Ing Gerr-Laaaand come together for a month-long frenzy of obsessive stupidity. Thanks the goddess it only happens every 4 years.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
The T-shirt was a birthday gift for my girlfriend and she absolutely loved it.

Happy that this tee is comfy and fits well. I wish the sentence was on the back too.
My wife absolutely loves her new T-shirt.
This looks like a weird design but it looks cool
This T shirt is the best piece of material to have ever graced this Earth. The fine quality fabrics and in depth definition, which is professionally implanted on the back of the shirt, which makes for some very interesting talking points. Thank you Pablo Parmesan.
Absolutely wonderful product! I bought this shirt for my son and he gagged with joy! Mariah Careystmas everyone!
I love it I bought me and my family some
Glad I had utmost FREEDOM OF SPEECH to express in articulate detail what evv it is the fk i was on a rant about that day. I haven't even received my shirt. I just a few moments ago placed the order. That is how pleased 😄 I am. Fk yeah fk yeah. Very empowering experience. My thoughts turned into type, that made some shi# happen. Having freedom of expression was most definitely...one fk ton of fun. A fk ton can be quantified as exuberance an joy beyond expectation. Fk yeah fk yeah. Awesome>>>
Proofread much? She might seem "quite"? Please fix the spelling to "quiet". Can't believe I was considering this purchase...
Damonism T-shirt :+) I found this by accident while surfing through your site. I love this shirt. I bought one and wear it when I feel frisky.
Another hit!
Great shirt, great service. A big thumbs up👍🏻
I always get so many compliments when I wear this (my favorite) shirt. I have been able to give out my phone number to lots of nice old men and my parents think it's great that I have so many nice mentors grooming me into a nice young boy who is willing to "follow the rules ".
Very comfortable and love the tyoeface
Very nice t-shirt. Fits perfect.
FUCK you urban dictionary.

My brother loved the shirt and the dogs name is cum stain
The small shirts for men looks like an extra small. Other than that I love the shirt.
AMAZING I GOT THE HILAARIOUS SHIRT AND LOVE IT MORE THAN ANYTHING!

I absolutely loveeeeeeee my shirt ! Fast shipping too !
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |