Fingolfin
Fingolfin was high king of the Noldor in JRR Tolkien's Legendarium. He was without a doubt the single most badass elf who ever lived. If you think that Fëanor was better than him, you are wrong and need to reevaluate your ability to judge the badassery of fantasy elves. You don't need to worship God anymore, because Fingolfin is better and would probably win in a fight. Unlike God, who is a goody two shoes, Fingolfin smoked mountains of weed and drank absent like it was warm milk*. He spent his spare time rescuing puppies from ravenous wolves and fighting dragons with a fork whilst completely naked*. Any female of sound mind would instantly drop her knickers for this beast of an elf. He could give a woman 24 orgasms in the space of 7 seconds*. (Why his wife Anairë left him is unknown, although I personally think it was because she was lesbian and was fucking Eärwen). He died fighting the most powerful being in the entirety of Middle Earth, Morgoth, although he probably would have won if not for this prophecy thing that is too complex to explain here. He still gave the dude a permanent limp and seven wounds though, and his body was carried away by a giant eagle. Now that shit is hardcore. The majority of major badasses in Middle Earth are descended from Fingolfin. This includes Eärendil, Elrond, Aragorn, Fingon, and Turgon. *Unconfirmed.
The Urban Dictionary Tee
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The shirts are amazing! I will be ordering again. And recommend them to others 🙂
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Amazing This shirt is SOOOOO comfortable and I love the definition
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The Fucklix t shirt is perfect but I am still waiting for the xlarge I ordered. These are gifts and will be just what is needed. Hope I receive the xlarge soon then it's time to give them to the people I ordered them for. So glad I saw them . Thanks.
My wife loves it. Nice quality and so funny for the wearer. Thank you!
The shirt fit amazing, package was shipped rather fast! Thank you so much..
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Love the short mine says bih on it
this shit stays on during sex
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mine had gay on it. Instant sex.
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Size Guide
Measurements may vary by up to 2" (5 cm). Pro tip: Measure one of your t-shirts at home and compare!
A - Length
Measure from the top of the collar to the bottom hem
B - Width
Measure across the chest from armpit to armpit
Size Chart
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 27" | 16½" |
| S | 28" | 18" |
| M | 29" | 20" |
| L | 30" | 22" |
| XL | 31" | 24" |
| 2XL | 32" | 26" |
| 3XL | 33" | 28" |
| Size | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
| XS | 69 cm | 42 cm |
| S | 71 cm | 46 cm |
| M | 74 cm | 51 cm |
| L | 76 cm | 56 cm |
| XL | 79 cm | 61 cm |
| 2XL | 81 cm | 66 cm |
| 3XL | 84 cm | 71 cm |