Donkey Saw

A practice popular in the Dominican Republic, the donkeysaw requires several pieces of apparati: 1. Durable plastic hair extensions of between 1 foot and 3 feet long. 2. A willing sexual partner with a pierced navel. The hair extension must be long enough to allow a tight slipknot to be formed. To perform the Donkeysaw, the receiver must attach the hair extensions to their navel piercing, and apply the slipknot on the other side so that it may snugly fit around the scrotum of the giver, there must be maximal tension in the cord in the rest position (receiver laying on back), but still enough to allow movement. The giver must perform oral sex on the receiver. As the receiver twitches and moves, their slight movements will tighten the slipknot fastened around the giver's scrotum. If this is performed the etymology of the name Donkeysaw will become apparent as the receiver may make a soft EENFING noise and the giver may cry AWWWWW in agony. Combining these in the correct order and taking into account the symbolism of the rhythmic motion, one may attain EEEEEFFFAWWWW, and thus the noise of a donkey having its nads cut off.