Christchurch

A city of around 400,000 people who jump into doorways and under tables on a regular basis. Toilets are often holes in the ground, and portable toilets are present on many streets. Sometimes one can see crap swimming down rivers to the sea. This is because so many of its residents shit themselves every time there is another earthquake. There is no central city any more - it all fell down. Brick chimneys and unreinforced brick walls are to be avoided. So are tall buildings, hills and cliff faces. February 22 2011 was the shakiest day yet.