Phoenix Coyotes

The Phoenix Coyotes are professional hockey team based out of Glendale Arizona, they currently play at Jobing.com Arena, The Coyotes boast some of the worst crowds in the entire league where on most nights if it weren’t for the Zamboni Driver, Ushers, Peanut Guy and the few hundred Canadians on vacation in the stands no one in town would know that there was a game being played. Since moving from Winnipeg in 1996 the Coyotes have flourished into a perennial bottom feeder with no end to the verbal diarrhea of excuses. The Coyote franchise has strived to establish themselves as a legitimate franchise with a rich hockey history at the expense of their previous home Winnipeg, Manitoba. Since moving in 96 the Coyotes have borrowed or more accurately stolen and manipulated the Winnipeg Jets history in an attempt to market themselves on and off the ice. They have laid claim to the Goals for Kids program, The Famous Winnipeg “White Out”, The retirement of former Jet players who NEVER played a single game for Phoenix, then they have the GALL and NERVE to place their numbers in their ESTEEMED “Ring of Honor”, (editors note – The Ring of Honor does not contain anything post 1996 from the Phoenix Franchise, Hmmmmmm) Currently Wayne Gretzky is the coach of the team and the headaches of this team are aging him faster than sour cream in a warm fridge. One might believe that this team is cursed since success has not followed them to the dessert, of all the other teams from the now defunct World Hockey Association, the Coyotes franchise is the only team to have never made the finals or won the Stanley Cup, that trend is sure to continue for a very long time as they are run like a Mickey Mouse operation, ironically it was Wayne Gretzky who called the New Jersey Devils that in 1983 after a 13 – 4 win by the Oilers. Recently the Coyotes unveiled a 10 year crest coined “Decade in the Dessert”, anyone with half a ounce of common sense could have foreseen this would become more affectionately referred to as “Disaster in the Dessert”.