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how to lose your virginity

*sex is like math: you add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and pray you dont multiply!* this is dedicaded 2 my JT, i love my baby, in the bed, ohhh i doooo Laydees & genitals ; introducing the fast & simple way 2 pop dat cherry. How to LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY!!! This guide is for ppl who no longer want 2 b the virgin they r. Here r the steps:( this is the pleasure guide, u will need a man) Remember, u don't want the guy 2 noe it's your first time, even though he may find out, u always gotta seem experienced, and lively otherwise he'll dump u flat & go jackin off some asian bitch.Let the guy take off yur clothes if u r shy, he'll noe wht 2 do if he suggests 2 'do it' W/e u do don't take off his clothes, yet. First, lick your fingers and start slowly rubbing the lips of your pussy. Keep on rubbing your own pussy, and then he will start to do the same. Rub around to make sure you are fully wet. When fully wet, find the clit, take his hand and start rubbing together firmly in a slow manner. Try different motions, go soft, then HARD. Okay, so this might not be that fun for the guy, but this is just the beggining, this is just 2 get your juices flowing, and that wild girl inside of you 2 *click*. Okay, so it seems slow right now eh? Then in a rapid momment, push him 2 the bed, and start cupping his grinal area. At this momment i bet u a hundred bucks he would take his shirt and pants off for you. I hope u've been teasing him and still wearing that bra of yours. Okay, so finally you seen the big gun. What do you do? NO, not sexual intercourse yet, you take both of your freaking hands woman, and start pleasuring, HIM. Rub everything but the bottom part. Cup his wank, squeze it a lil hard, then losen your grip and take your pinky/ index finger and lightly touch the tip of his penis. Teasing is all there is 2 the game of sex, where u should have some control. Tease him by repeating this, and even in the process, use some tongue. He is likely at this momment, playing with your breasts. Remember folks, boys r always gonna b boys. OKAY----, the moment u all have been waiting for:popping that big juicy cherry that's gonna rot soon if u don't pop it with that big juicy penis. Okay, rite now, he's like, either really high, or drowsy. He'll go easy cuz he's already cummed like, a million times. Ladies, don't ride ontop, it hurts hell if its' your first time. Like a stick going threw your pussy, straight up your stomach. Always bottom, safest, comfy, and a pillow if he sticks it in the wrong hole ( o.O *virgin*) Open your legs, not like a ballerina doing the splits tho, make sure yur in a comfertable place. Don't u dare look at his penis going into your v-hole, lady, it's gonna b bloody rain (LOL) OKay, the first hurts, but u have 2 let him do it again. This time, open your legs up real wide, stop your hands from holding the matress, and open up those lips on your pussy cat. This time it will feel like heaven. U noe, u can't take the good without the bad. Yay, u did it. Now, some other moves, if u don't noe wht 2 do after that... - suck on his dick so he can losen up - remember the kisses, and holding him tight - remember the attention on your melons, he dangit will repect those two, he has 2 worship them MOVES: THE BUTTERFLY THE DOGGY THE FISH HOOK THE DIRTY SANCHEZ <---my last name!!! ; ) the first one is my favourite, see ya guys, i'll update soon <3

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
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Quick shipping and awesome hysterical product!

Karin L.Feb 16
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I fucked with it for months before i finally ate it.

12314 1.Feb 15

Great mug! Got a homo mug for a friend's birthday and he adored it. :)

Cassiel M.Feb 15
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love it

celine d.Feb 14
Review by poop f.

THINGS ARE GETTING A LITTLE WILD AT CAILLOU'S HOUSE!

poop f.Feb 14

The thing is amazing. Also everything on the back is true!

NikolaiFeb 13

Professor - I am loving this ....not all professors are blasted toward intellectualism. I believe smart comes in all different sizes, color, beauty, and personality. I will use this coffee cup proudly. Loving it in Denver. Jax

jaxFeb 13

It was great! Very hard to break and easy to hold! Also very cute

Sanjay P.Feb 12
Review by Manley P.

I sent my friend the Wordle URL for her to enjoy. She did her first Wordle and got so excited, she sent me a text including the answer she got. This showed at the top of my screen and I read it - there was no way to un-read it so I was ... wordlefucked for the day!

Manley P.Feb 12
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Solid mug. Funny design. Fair price

Steve C.Feb 12
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My dad hits me with his mug. It's very very durable

Ball L.Feb 11

I got the Capybara one made by FAUBCOK and it was so good quality!

Keera U.Feb 11

i loved the mug, gave it to my grandmother on her birthday

Bart D.Feb 8

The mug is great! I bought it as a gag gift for a friend, and I didn't really think it was going to be a good mug, but when I got it I was super surprised! It is really high quality feeling ceramic and the print is very clear and good looking. It was also packaged really well, and the shipping process was nice too! It did take longer than I thought to get here, but it's understandable as I did order it custom. In all it is an amazing mug and I think I'm gonna have to buy one for myself.

Kara G.Feb 8
✓ Verified Purchase

This mug is great! It comes in perfect condition and I love that you can change the definitions! I put my name and then I put the definition as ‘the best person’. Made my day every time I picked it up.

Alice J.Feb 8

My name is Asher, I looked my name up a few days ago and we all had a good laugh. Now, this mug is my go to morning mug for drinking my herbal tea and plotting to take over the realms.

Asher T.Feb 8

I just love it. Just like I ordered!

susan s.Feb 7
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Exactly as promised.

Lou F.Feb 7
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To beginulate, the muglification of the vessel is both pleasing to the eye as well as the hand. Secondly, the option of choosing one's own colors adds to the lessening if the so called " buyer's remorse" which so often accompanies modern "on line" purchases.

John B.Feb 7
Review by Jade P.

My husband absolutely loves this! This was a difficult product to find but it turned out perfectly! He was cracking up. Definitely worth the buy.

Jade P.Feb 7
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