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Zombie

The Walking Dead. Scientific name Homo Coprophagus Somnambulus. A deceased human being who has partially returned to life due to undeterminable causes. The brain retains base facilities, namely gross motor function. In its near-mindless state, it grasps no remains of emotion, personality, or sensation of pain. In rare cases, some of the reanimated have reflexively preformed routine activities from their past lives. The rotting bodies of the undead operate on a fraction of the level at which our bodies normally function. Circulatory, respiratory, and digestive systems are unaffected by reanimation. Labored breathing, choking, and moaning are reflexive but no oxygen is carried through the blood. The nervous system functions primarily within the brain and brain stem. Sensory reception is minimal at best and seemingly unecessary in the pursuit of prey. The undead are incapable of fatigue and will persist at any cost. They will even crawl when their legs have been removed. Even if the head is removed from the body, it will continue to live. The only way to stop the reanimated is to destroy the brain. To prevent reanimation in the recently departed, decapitate the corpse and burn the body. The only observable action a zombie takes part in is killing living creatures, especially humans, and eating them. Many theories and speculations surround this disturbing behavior. One theory is based on the thought that reanimation is the result of a contagious infection or virus, and that the primal drive to feed will spread the disease to other host bodies. Research has shown that although the majority of zombie attacks result in fatal wounds, all corpses return to life soon after passing, regardless of cause of death. Another theory is that zombies eat the brains of the living to refuel the "un-life" giving chemical serotonin. Because digestive and circulatory systems are incapable of bringing these elements to the brain, this just cannot be true. The final speculation seems the most obvious, that the dead feed for sustenance to satiate their unnatural metabolism. But because the gut has no function in the undead, this is also false. One documented encounter claims that a zombie was unable to move due to the sheer mass of undigested flesh resting in its distended gut. The creature continued to eat even after it's gut had burst open. Studies regarding the nature of feeding have proven that zombies will try to eat when their stomachs and even jaws have been removed. One explanation offers that the walking dead are the incarnation of death itself, a mockery of life that uses the vessels of the living to carry out their dark intentions, they are the opposite of life and are driven to simply undo it.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
636
62
10
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15

Thanks guys, I knew I was hot but not *that* hot

Hamza L.Jun 30

Great way to wake up and clear your head every morning with the reminder of the day you woke up dumb enough to spend $32.95 for a basic coffee mug

Sacrewd B.Jun 30

Couldn't wait until the mug got home. Immediately after i bought it i wet myself. I couldn't help it. I got so bored of waiting i ordered 5 more mugs. And then another 5. And then ANOTHER 5. And now i have fucking 60 mugs that say schizophrenia on them. I only intended on gifting this mug to my schizophrenic younger sibling as a last gift before i inevitably must suffocate him with his own pillow. Now with all these mugs and have decided to put one mug on the old couple across the street's doorstep each day until eventually they are convinced that they are schizophrenic and see things that aren't there. Next i will get them to be taken to a mental institute where they will be locked up to live in an all-white facility for the rest of their lives. My hope is that i can do this to all of the neighbors on my street so i can finally get enough space so that i can run my hamster experiments in peace without my neighbors always wonder what the small hamster screams coming from my basement are. Anyways nice mug 8/10.

Death Z.Jun 29

I dont remember writing "I have dementia" in this cup ? a bit strange... nice cup tho.

Hugh J.Jun 29

I dont even own the mug. I just wanted to write a review about how epic it is>>> fuck you

iygugkuy j.Jun 29

my kids loved it. delicious and a great snack. would buy again.

Annabelle S.Jun 28

it was great 💀

💀 �.Jun 28

Gave it to my girl, she loved it.

Stephen S.Jun 28

Best mug I have ever had

Bob B.Jun 28

love shoving it up my ass on a daily!!!!!

michael m.Jun 27

WOW THIS MUG MATCHES MY NAME I'M DEFINITELY GETTING THIS FOR MY BIRTHDAY

Jenny P.Jun 27

WOW I LOVE THIS SO MUCH IT EVEN MATCHES MY NAME! I'm definitely getting this mug for my birthday!

Jenny P.Jun 27

I got morb’d

Morbiu S.Jun 27

This jar is amazing for vomiting in! i definitely recommend if you have ugly kids!

kill m.Jun 26

This cup is cool. I farted on it and my butt tickled

Doop S.Jun 26
Review by Fay D.

Perfect customized gift- super easy and quick to do and the order arrived in under a week!

Fay D.Jun 25
✓ Verified Purchase

Smaller than I expected for the price.

Susan .Jun 25
✓ Verified Purchase

i use my mug for sperm donation

QuandaleJun 24

10/10, great for taking a massive shit in. Overflows if its more than 2 pounds, but its part of the fun, right?

Mike O.Jun 24

Needed one to gift to my colleague in pests exptermination department, takes care of my bug pretty well. Damn well of a bugger, if I would, ol' chap. 😌

Juck F.Jun 24

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