Zombic

It is a religion in which we believe in: we have a zombie jesus named Marvin. Our leader is Marvin, not god, leader. you may know him as the zombie jesus. Marvins date of birth is not known because honestly no one knows a person is a jesus when they are born. Marvin was a male who was a sexy mother fucker, he lived his life to the fullest, when in his 20's (during the 80's) he drank alcohol, went to lots of shows,fucked as many women as possible and did what ever the fuck he wanted. which is why we do not tell you not to do many things, there are only a few no nos.Marvin died, and was reincarnated the following year on the date of his death he killed many people but was brutally murder with a shot gun. There will be zombie apocalypse which we call zomb-aclypse.when is unknown but what will happen is all dead believers in zombic will arise and eat till they explode,literally. and all living believers in zombic will not be harmedand when the die, many years later there will be another zomb-aclypse which they wil participate in. When meeting another zombic feel more then welcome to use our secret password. (om nom nom nom) when engaging in conversation. not only is it a funny word.but it also ressembles the sound of zombies eating stupid people brains. Please remeber that zombies only eat stupid people brains only because all the smart people learn to stay away from the zombies and are most likely zombic, but all the idotic people, yeah, the zombies have no mercy for them. when we die we will come back as zombies duing the zomb-alypse. believe in love making to the extreme. us zombics, fuck as much as we can, not only is it good exercise but it is just a delightful activity, now we are not saying whore yourself out but if you find yourself a partner in which you are comfortable with fuck when ever you want, where ever you want please know your state laws on the subject. Getting shitfaced in order to cause mayhem is more then exceptable, we encourage it but our religion is not a pushy one so if you choose not to drink you don't have too and will not be riducled. Drugs, are a no no, they kill the brain cells zombies eat. Zombie take over will occur during the catholic religions holiday passover what year is un- known. Zombies, do not carry virus's they simply kill people for food the only way to become a zombie is to firmly believe in our religion.and then die. under no circumstances, may you own a rifle or any type of gun. If not needed for occupation. Vampires absolutely do not exsist, they are fake,however zombies, are indeed real. they just enjoy lots of sleep. which may be why you do not see them anymore. because they sleep all at once for decades at a time. If you do become a zombie during the Zomb-aclypse please note, christians are our number one target here, so that we can laugh when they realize "oh shit, we were the wrong pushy retarted dumb asses" Please do not impersonate zombies in a bad manner, this isn't polite at all, zombies have never done anything to you and all though they are they walking dead they do have feelings too. Morgan Freeman is the most powerfulman on this earth whether or not he is Zombic, he has earned the right to live happily, so if some expresses a bad oppinion of him they will be beaten brutaly by every able bodied zombic in the area. if a zombic thinks other wise, they burn, yes that is right, they spontaniously combust and burn, this is a deadly sin and a personal attack agianst Marvin who is indeed a HUGE fan of morgan freeman. Violence is almost always the answer,if you do not like someone feel more then privleded to punch them in the face, but shhhhh don't tell the law what really happened, lie and say it was self defense. and on that note if you are suffering from any kind of abuse we suggest hit them hard enough once, so they get the hint and realize they will get they're ass beat down if the mess wih you. As for prophainity use it as much as you can it makes words fun! we do believe to each his own, so please do not be racist, sexist, pregidous, but we also do believe in fun, so you may JOKE as much as you want, its just a joke, but if it isn't, that just makes you a dick, and not the good kind attach to males that you engage in sexual behavior with, no the kind that everyone hates. but not the kind the feminist hate.because thats the kind you engage in sexual behaviors with. only cool kids are zombic ;