Vampires
Beautiful, age-old creatures that evolved alongside humans. Pale skinned and incredibly strong. Have been known to leave hand prints in cars by pure accident. If a Vampire feeds on human blood their eyes are blood red normally and black when they are thirsty. Where as if a Vampire feeds on animal blood their eye colour normally is a golden butterscotch colour. Vampires can come out in the day though seem even more beautiful in the sunlight so they prefer to keep out of the public eye when the sun is out. This is why most vampires tend to live in the colder less sunny areas of the world. To become a vampire you must be bitten but left alive. It takes a lot of restrain for a vampire not to take all your blood whilst doing this. Once bitten it takes up to three days for the venom to spread. Time preiod depens on the closeness of the bite to the heart. During this three day period victims are often delirious and not many can remember much of their time except an extremely painful burning. NOTE: BECOMING A VAMPIRE DOES NOT MAKE YOU BEAUTIFUL, VAMPIRES OFTEN CHOOSE EXTRODINARY HUMANS AS THEIR COMPANIONS AS AN INSTINCT, VAMPIRISM JUST MAKES THIS BEAUTY MORE PRONOUNCED. For the first year of a vampire's life they will be less pale and red-eyed. This is due to the human blood remaining in their veins. Due to the blood new vampires are incredibly strong but this does not mean they are any less thirsty. Vampires cannot have children, A vampires body is frozen in the stae of when he/she was bitten. If a woman was pregnant at the time she would remain pregnant for eternity. Vampires cannot sleep and essentially do not need to breathe though many prefer to as their sense of smell would be affected. Some vampires gain extra senses on changing into a vampire. This is because, like their hearing, smell, eyesight etc, their characteristics are intensified. For Example a particularly charismatic person may gain the abilty to influence peoples emotions or someone who was quite good at reading emotions may be able to hear the thoughts of those around them.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
I like it, but not a lot. Also, the mugs are overpriced.
i luv it! great quality and actually the same hight as mossoflife!
Loved it, my co-workers liked the mug.
best mug every i get to wake up every morning to sip out of my sexy lama mug
I really like this mug. It’s quite bizarre and helps me live a quiet life in my small town of Morioh, Japan.
briliant buy great gift for my grandkid! love it!
This mug saved my life from spiraling down a deep dark path.
Great present for my wife, she uses it all the time, and it's her to a T.
I love it. High quality. Just as I had hoped.
This mug looks great! I love it!
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
best mug ever spittin nothin but fax
i fucking hate your mugs and shirts
awesome product!
This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help
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