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Vampires

Beautiful, age-old creatures that evolved alongside humans. Pale skinned and incredibly strong. Have been known to leave hand prints in cars by pure accident. If a Vampire feeds on human blood their eyes are blood red normally and black when they are thirsty. Where as if a Vampire feeds on animal blood their eye colour normally is a golden butterscotch colour. Vampires can come out in the day though seem even more beautiful in the sunlight so they prefer to keep out of the public eye when the sun is out. This is why most vampires tend to live in the colder less sunny areas of the world. To become a vampire you must be bitten but left alive. It takes a lot of restrain for a vampire not to take all your blood whilst doing this. Once bitten it takes up to three days for the venom to spread. Time preiod depens on the closeness of the bite to the heart. During this three day period victims are often delirious and not many can remember much of their time except an extremely painful burning. NOTE: BECOMING A VAMPIRE DOES NOT MAKE YOU BEAUTIFUL, VAMPIRES OFTEN CHOOSE EXTRODINARY HUMANS AS THEIR COMPANIONS AS AN INSTINCT, VAMPIRISM JUST MAKES THIS BEAUTY MORE PRONOUNCED. For the first year of a vampire's life they will be less pale and red-eyed. This is due to the human blood remaining in their veins. Due to the blood new vampires are incredibly strong but this does not mean they are any less thirsty. Vampires cannot have children, A vampires body is frozen in the stae of when he/she was bitten. If a woman was pregnant at the time she would remain pregnant for eternity. Vampires cannot sleep and essentially do not need to breathe though many prefer to as their sense of smell would be affected. Some vampires gain extra senses on changing into a vampire. This is because, like their hearing, smell, eyesight etc, their characteristics are intensified. For Example a particularly charismatic person may gain the abilty to influence peoples emotions or someone who was quite good at reading emotions may be able to hear the thoughts of those around them.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
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I love it. High quality. Just as I had hoped.

David M.Apr 29
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This mug looks great! I love it!

Rebecca J.Apr 28
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I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459

Rowan P.Apr 28

This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing

Luke K.Apr 28

War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.

ha h.Apr 28

Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.

Michael T.Apr 28

I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother

Deni B.Apr 27

Super Funny Mug 😂

Emmanuel D.Apr 27

best mug ever spittin nothin but fax

Thomas J.Apr 27

i fucking hate your mugs and shirts

annetteApr 26
Review by joe M.

awesome product!

joe M.Apr 25

This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help

Quantavious B.Apr 24

The mug is awesome, the yellow color is great but green is also good, the scream mug is the best mug in my entyre live!!! I can't imagine my life without this mug, i cant stop buing it.... I have like 30 mugs every color in this site and also i'm ordered a new one, please help me.

normal g.Apr 24

It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy

Evan G.Apr 23

This mug made me horny.

Quandale D.Apr 23

looks perfect!!! we loved it

Thalia A.Apr 22
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I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen

Mark M.Apr 22
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I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better

Quandale D.Apr 21

it's the best mug of the world !!!!!

michel j.Apr 21

wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!

deez n.Apr 20

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