Vagina cartwheels mug
An elaborate sexual maneuver involving weeks of preparation and a large initial cost investment (should be avoided by all but the most committed and enthusiastic individuals). Supplies needed: octopus, gym membership, a fun-loving and adventure-seeking spirit, more lube than you've ever used in your life, an on-site surgeon (in case of disaster) and Grimm's Book of Fairy Tales. Instructions: 1) become extremely fit as a member of your local gym or community center. 2) purchase a salt water tank and octopus-- preferably a Caribbean reef octopus for its lovely indigo hue, but the common Octopus vulgaris will do. 3) *ANIMAL CRUELTY INVOLVED IN THE FOLLOWING STEP* De-tentacle the octopus, and desert the body in the appropriate biohazard container of your choice. Preserve the tentacles in your salt water tank. 4) Read your partner, in the accent of your choice, the most fucked-up of Grimm's Fairy Tales. Excellent choices include Little Red Riding Hood and Hansel & Gretel. 4) For every murmur of horror they admit, slap your partner's genitalia with the tentacles. 5) Repeat until the fairy tales are complete or the tentacles no longer have any live neurons and cannot move on their own. 6) Afterwards, do cartwheels to air out one's vagina! THE VAGINA CARTWHEEL IS NOT COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS PROCESS. THIS SEXUAL MANEUVER IS ILLEGAL IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES AND PUERTO RICO. SATISFACTION GUARANTEED* (post-traumatic stress disorder a distinct possibility)
The Urban Dictionary Mug
- Glossy ceramic, 11 oz
- Vivid artwork fused into the finish, not a vinyl decal
- Microwave and dishwasher safe
- Word on front, definition on back
- Approximately 3.8" tall
- Every order personally reviewed
- Returns & defect-free guarantee
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Customer Reviews
I appreciated the email asking if the content was correct. Excellent quality and attention to detail. Thank you!
its an incredible mug! i would recommend purchasing this awesome product!
Damonism and #Stolen Valor Coffee Mug These coffee mugs are rugged, solid, high quality and keep the liquids hotter, longer. The definitions of both mugs are spot-on! I will definitely by more. Great work Urban Dictionary!
why is this a real thing? AND YA'LL ACTING LIKE IT'S NORMAL!?
I really like the mug, but I thought I had ordered the all pink one. What came was a white with a block of pink with "Fubar" written on it.
the only reason why i care about humanity this mug is the reason why i believe humanity deserves a second chance, even after they blaspheme my name. this mug is the greatest thing i've ever seen and i have ordered many of them. this mug replaces the holy grail. the bible should've told about the wonderful deeds of the mug and how it saved humanity from my wrath. alas, whilst the laws keep me from tampering with human minds and altering holy objects like the bible, i can only pass on my message: "spread the news and buy this mug!"
Its.. omg, its............. AMAZING AMAZING OMG ITS SOOO GOOD
A mug for your boyfriend Paul????? My boyfriend is not called Paul. I don't even have a boyfriend
Great mug... finally got my ""your mom gay lol" mug, I'm so happy
ariana grande mug omg this slays mah life
It was easy to correct grammar when necessary, and then to order a great gift for a member of a wedding party. Nice, simple, and sturdy mug.
with this we regain gods trust This mug changes my views of humanity. I think we may have a chance of not going extinct. Everyone should own this fantastic mug. Oh it's also has a nice handle.
Love that I got an Urban Dictionary word definition from someone I know! So much fun and great memory item!! 😊
I like it but it took a long time getting here
Very basic mug but does the trick!
The mug is of good quality but advertisement needs to change as the sample photo for ordering gives the customer an illusion that the entire mug is of that color ordered when it is not
muffinism mug very bold mug i love it u should buy one
Oof oof this mug gives me life every single day. i have no other reason to wake up in the morning. also this website is the only thing that's ever loved me.
The fact you guys make custom mugs is the most hilarious yet smartest thing ever, thank you so much I'm definitely gonna collect these and chuckle at the crazy words/terms only I will understand the depth of! 😂
Nice, but I need the “Reservation Dogs” version of “Aho!”