Urban Wimp
An internet addict that scours the Urban Dictionary looking for reasons to be offended. The Urban WImp or Urban Coward is an internet addict, usually male, who never leaves a chat room let alone their house. The Urban Coward scours the Urban Dictionary for any definitions it can cry over and make whinging complaints to the management about. This is the only way it can generate emails that are not spam or Nigerians trying to access their benefit bank account. They see danger everywhere and will not log on before donning full combats (including nana knitted vest, bobble hat, mittens and scarf with cute grenade poms poms),tin foil marine commando helmet, and camouflage incontinent pants. They scrutinise the chat room lists lookiing for hidden enemies in disguise and will accuse any room newbie of being an old enemy out to get them. Their main form of defence is attack and the 'enemy'is anyone who gets more than 2 hellos when they enter a chat room or who has the ability to have a meaningful conversation, a life outside the internet or who has the temerity to have a modicum of success in their life. (this excludes the odd (very odd) female sycophants with imaginary horses, holiday homes and husbands who agree with everything they say in case the Urban Coward turns on them, oh and the usual drug addicts alkies who will talk to anyone that isnt going to arrest or section them). The Urban Coward's attacks take the form of whining abuse from the safety of a screen name and prolonged and empty threats. The extreme Urban Coward will even pay money to track down their perceived enemy in real life so they can pretend to have gone to their targets (usually owned) houses and peeped through the letter box. This entirely imaginary event is usually awarded with the Trash Annie Lol which comes with its own STD health warning and genital disinfectant. The Urban Coward attracts like minded pond life, these are usually of even a lower inellectual ability than their 'leader' most often desperately lonely females so needy they will cling like dung beetles to a turd and never mind the stench. Occasionally, the isolated Urban Coward will hook up with other Urban Cowards, such as pretend ex SAS and would be rapist poets who vent their frustrations by the writing of unsavoury and inept limericks To be an Urban Coward is to be an inadequate loner, shit scared of real life and resentful of any that have any semblance of happiness in theirs. (That would be the rest of humanity).
The Urban Dictionary Mug
I love it. High quality. Just as I had hoped.
This mug looks great! I love it!
I have a crippling addiction to these mugs, i have 459
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
best mug ever spittin nothin but fax
i fucking hate your mugs and shirts
awesome product!
This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help
The mug is awesome, the yellow color is great but green is also good, the scream mug is the best mug in my entyre live!!! I can't imagine my life without this mug, i cant stop buing it.... I have like 30 mugs every color in this site and also i'm ordered a new one, please help me.
It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy
This mug made me horny.
looks perfect!!! we loved it
I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen
I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better
it's the best mug of the world !!!!!
wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!
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