Time Machine

1. A machine, usually imagined as a vehicle that can travel through the dimension of time. Something that has been sought after since the dawn of science, a few scintists believe we are on the verge of actually coming up with a working machine for sending messages back through time using high intensity lasers to warp space in a similar way that black holes do. 2. Possibly the most famous sci-fi time machine was driven by Marty McFly in the Back to the Future trilogy, it was made from a DeLorean, one of the most useless cars ever made (presumably to be ironic), which has gull-wing doors and looks a lot like a Lotus Esprit. The Time Machine was a novel by H.G. Wells in the 1800's, it was one of the first works of science fiction to inspire real scientists to begin studying time. Side effects of time travel include paradoxes like if you killed your own grandfather before he concieved your father you wouldn't be able to return to the same future you came from, causing alternate realities. 3. Time Machine is also a term that can be used for a bottle of vodka or other high volume spirit. If downed quickly it can create a memory black out, so the next thing you remember after beginning to drink is waking up the next morning. This creates a sense of "what the, who the, where the, did I just?" in the subject, a lot like if you had just travelled through time. Side effects of time travel include soiling your underwear, excessive vomiting, causing a public scene, trying to grope your best mate, coming back from the toilet with your trousers still down, falling over, attempting children's playground obstacle courses, getting arrested and of course waking up in a police cell with no money and having to walk home with a turd in your underwear. You are also likely to wish you'd travelled a little further into the future, since no one who saw you will let you forget it for about a year.