The Chiv

A vile, fatal disease originating from the embodiment of pestilence himself, Mr Andy Chivers. Caused by inhaling or ingesting his bodily secretions. Gases produced by his corrosive vomit or toxic ejaculate should be avoided at all costs. Physical contact may result in scabbing, blisters, or pulsating warts. Upon contraction of The Chiv the victim will instantly rendered infertile and a bad sket. Within the first 10 days the intelligence of the victim will drastically drop, reducing someone once completely eloquent to shouting phrases such as 'not in me arse lad' or 'some o dat bing man'. Following this the victim's mental state will continue to deteriorate, their skin will begin to shrivel, they will suddenly become addicted to drugs that they have never tried, and want to start shagging less attractive creatures. After an unspecified amount of time the victim will eventually succumb to The Chiv, dying horribly in a pile of their own faecal matter and tears. Plz shar 2 spred awarnes.