Talos
Talos the mighty! Talos the unerring! Talos the unassailable! To you we give praise! We are but maggots, writhing in the filth of our own corruption! While you have ascended from the dung of mortality, and now walk among the stars! But you were once man! Aye! And as man, you said, "Let me show you the power of Talos Stormcrown, born of the North, where my breath is long winter. I breathe now, in royalty, and reshape this land which is mine. I do this for you, Red Legions, for I love you." Aye, love. Love! Even as man, great Talos cherished us. For he saw in us, in each of us, the future of Skyrim! The future of Tamriel! And there it is, friends! The ugly truth! We are the children of man! Talos is the true god of man! Ascended from flesh, to rule the realm of spirit! The very idea is inconceivable to our Elven overlords! Sharing the heavens with us? With man? Ha! They can barely tolerate our presence on earth! Today, they take away your faith. But what of tomorrow? What then? Do the elves take your homes? Your businesses? Your children? Your very lives? And what does the Empire do? Nothing! Nay, worse than nothing! The Imperial machine enforces the will of the Thalmor! Against its own people! So rise up! Rise up, children of the Empire! Rise up, Stormcloaks! Embrace the word of mighty Talos, he who is both man and Divine! Terrible and powerful Talos! We, your unworthy servants, give praise! For only through your grace and benevolence may we truly reach enlightenment!
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Customer Reviews

Easy to order and packaged well!!
It's an amazing product!
got one for Cole M.'s mother, she loved it! Best mediocrely- timed sex ever!!!
Cole M. got me one for my birthday, fastest sex ever
Cole M. got this for me. best sex of my life.
Got it for Cole M. girlfriend. Slowest sex of my life.
Fucking awesome. Bought this while drunk and don't regret it.
Cole M. gifted one for me on my birthday. I will never forget that day. 10/10
I didn’t get one yet but if I did it would also be for Cole M.’s girlfriend, we would have amazing sex
Great mug…. Got one for Cole M.’s girlfriend.
I ordered a customized mug for my gf and everything came out well. There were no autocorrect mistakes and the mug was unscratched. Would shop here again
Also got one for Cole M.'s girlfriend, even faster sex.
Perfect gift! My husband loved it. So funny and clever!
Great mug… got one for my girlfriend… instant sex
Is a great mug that I purchased as a gag gift for a coworker. You know the one who also as interesting words/phrases that only urban dictionary can explain. Great as a coffee mug and better as conversation piece!
Great gift!
Really fast and looks great! Took a chance on Christmas gift and it was a success!
Awesome mug feels really nice good weight and color although I think the shade could be a little brighter when it comes to the highlighter yellow, I am still pleased with the outcome and the fact that a whole passage was so neatly printed onto the product, very pleased with the packaging too! That made it so easy to wrap just in time for Christmas. Who knew!!
Nice mug, great feel‼️
Perfect!
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