St. Elmo, IL

St. Elmo is a town located along Interstate 70 in South-Central Illinois and its population is around 1500. St. Elmo High School is home to the Eagles and, inevitably, the bottom layer of scum in the United States social class system. The town is basically a plutocracy, with the wealthy, who made their fortunes through good ol' oil, pay for 90% of the teachers' salaries through property tax. The other people, who make up 95% of the population, live off and cheat the system through welfare and/or a large inheritance. The town prides itself off of victories, fairly or unfairly achieved, over the Altamont Indians. This hatred for a town so close to them has arose out of thin air. They think that Altamont, and other small towns, have a conscious evil agenda against the diminutive and unappealing town that is simply not there. The townspeople throw all class and respect out the window when supporting their school at various sporting events, with elderly women shouting obscene remarks and random adults threatening physical harm on high school fans from other schools. Do not be mistaken, there are respectable and nice people who live in and are from St. Elmo, but collectively, they could be described as unintelligent, classless, and simply unaware. Do not visit St. Elmo. It, in no way, will stimulate your interests and help you grow as a person. It can, however, teach you how not to live.