Severus Snape
A severely snarky Wizard who is a Master at potion brewing. He is an ex-Death Eater who has spent more than a decade spying for a group of "good" Wizards known as the Order of the Phoenix. He can be described as having shoulder-length, greasy black hair; a long hooked nose; black, lightless eyes; sallow skin; and being skinny and "bat-like" (due to his billowing black robes). Severus Snape is the former potions instructor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. His contract for teaching at the institution ended at the death of his employer. While Severus Snape was indeed the one who cast the curse that killed the late Headmaster of Hogwarts, there has been much debate about wether or not Severus had a choice in the matter. This writer believes that, while Severus may be a horridly cruel man with a haunting past, he would never commit such an act without an extremely good reason. Severus Snape was a harsh instructor at the school to all but students in his own house (Slytherin). Severus appears to hate all in his path, but this writer believes his heart is not as cold as it is made out to be. There are five main catergories of attitudes towards Severus Snape: Catergory 1: "Meh" You could care less if he was in the book or not. If he dies, great... if not, great. You hardly noticed him until the end of the 6th book and you still don't care what happens to him. Catergory 2: "That evil @*&%ing bastard!" You are similar to the "meh" catergory, except that at the end of the 6th book, you wanted his blood. Catergory 3: "I KNEW he was evil!! See? I TOLD you!!" You've 'known' all along that Severus was "evil" and have never liked him. Some of you may even have little voodoo Severus dolls with pins in the private. Catergory 4: "OMG!!!11!! Snape is soooo hottt!!111!!!" You are the most feared of them all. You think of Severus Snape as the Alan Rickman portrayal you see in the movies. Silky voice, dark past, cool demeanor.... pure sex to you. You're most likely ditzy "blondes" (in the bad sense of the term... can also be ditzy brunette, red-head, etc. Hair colour has NOTHING to do with intelligence) or goth wannabes with pictures of vampires and dead animals on your walls. Get. A. Life. Catergory 5: "Severus is awesome. So much friggin' junk on his plate and he gets treated like a dog with fleas. Stupid idiots." A MUCH more toned down version of catergory 4. He may be your favourite character or not, but you respect him. You know he's gone through twelve piles of stinking elephant dung for the Light and the fact he gets treated like said piles infuriates you. You'd like to scream at Harry to pull his head out of his arse for one moment to stop and think that he and Severus went through the same thing withing hours of each other (Harry being forced to give the potion to Albus.... Severus being forced to kill his employer and friend). You know he has dark secrets and you like him INSPITE of that fact, not BECAUSE of it (like those in catergory 4).
The Urban Dictionary Mug
My friend and I added a word ! Gotta get merch of it now. Thanks for the coffee mug!
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