Sean

A phenomenal magical man that will love you to your core, every piece of you..behind closed doors. He will approximately once a year let you know what you mean to him. When you're with him however all you will get out of him is criticisms and various hate speech about you. Don't worry, these words aren't about you, they're about him. It's the only way he can get such self hatred out, which he shouldn't have btw, because he's the most amazing guy on the entire planet. He will make what he hates about himself your fault and your problem. He can't stop the trash words out of his mouth. Even if he wants you to stay he will tell you to go, even going so far as to remove you with the police, all the while his eyes telling you he needs you. He lives walled up behind a self preservation barrier on an island of loneliness. He thinks he is perfect and underneath the porcupine exterior. he is. But you'll end up rabid and full of quills if you try. Noone can save this adorable raccoon from himself but him. Steals hearts and cracks them, steals your coat straight out of the dryer at the wash. And wants all your coins and internet because he is a leprechaun. He's really a beautiful unicorn though. And I will always love him. I wanted to invite him for Christmas and corn dogs but he bit me instead. My little oatmeal monster who needs head pats and songs. I know all the solutions to his pain but he swatted that away too. You know my number.