Redding
The best small town in CT, Redding is host to many of the stereotypes also found throughout Fairfield County, CT. Most families reel in over $150,000 a year, and live in $600,000+ homes, with more than a handful of houses priced at over a million dollars. This is to be expected after all, it is Fairfield County. The younger generation in Redding attends Joel Barlow High School. Those attending the high school share their learning environment with their fellow Eastonites, making up a student body of about 1000, giving you an idea as to why Redding is the best small town. Due to the small student body, most sports team are unsuccessful, especially football and hockey, although soccer fares considerably well each season. School spirit is nearing an all-time low. A small number of students choose to avoid JBHS and go to private school, but remain close with their public school counterparts. The school is plagued with wannabe kids yet to find their purpose in life. JBHS is home to no shortage of emo kids and ghetto wannabes. Cliques based on these dress styles and fake personalities form among the entering freshman quickly. The emo kids band together, and the ghetto kids pretend to be 'down' in the 'rougher cities' like Brideport, see B-po, and Norwalk, despite the fact many of them probably only visit relatives in these towns. By far, the most consistent stereotype among Reddingites is the trademark North Face fleece wearing, Jeep Cherokee or better driving, DMB listening teenager, who is not ashamed to buy weed or alcohol with his parents cash. Unless you are an emo bitch or a ghetto punk, the most popular music to listen to is Dave Matthews Band. When asked why, you typically justify with the comment, "Because it is just so chill". Compared to the nearby, and wealthier towns of Westport and Fairfield, Redding teens sport their pastel colored polos less, but there is no shortage of preppy looks either. For enjoyment, partying is the name of the game for Redding kids. Beiruit, or 'ruit, as it is commonly called is quickly becoming Redding's favorite pastime. Drugs are fairly common as well, and there have been a considerable number of drug busts at the high school for such a small population. Rich kids with too much time on their hands...
The Urban Dictionary Mug
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War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
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