Quinton

A stringy haired guy who thinks he has a future in the music business. Generally a dropout who has a crazy mom that looks like a cross dresser with a bad eye and who says her childhood was spent pimped out as a child prostitute. Their fathers are, more often than not, failed tan salon owners who dress like Jimmy Buffet and live in the back of the salon and drink away their delirium tremens. Quintons smoke dope and/or drop acid on the daily and screws girls (who look like primates) who chew Skoal and then uses the empty cans for plugs in her super stretched ear lobes. Early male pattern baldness and a bitter attitude plague him. Has a bad habit of picking dingle berries out of his butt hair and chews them while lounging on the couch watching videos of local bands he will never live up to. Quintons are all laughing stocks to the people they think are their friends, they are just too easy to make fun of.