Phoenix
America’s largest suburb and is not a city by any means. “The Valley” as it is called is actually a very fast-growing mesh of identical suburbs that comprise a very dull metropolis, for its size (almost 4 million people), in the Sonoran Desert of south-central Arizona. Phoenix does not constitute a typical large metropolitan profile by most standards and sucks, generally speaking. It isn’t New York. Isn’t L.A. Isn’t Chicago. Isn’t Washington DC. Isn’t Phily. Isn’t San Fran. Isn’t Seattle. Isn’t Miami. Isn’t Atlanta. And even isn’t Dallas-Ft. Worth. Why? No culture (illegal immigrants don’t count). No diversity. Not much greenspace. No rapid transit. No skyline. Not a major educational center (despite having ASU in nearby Tempe). Not a major manufacturing center. Not a major healthcare center. Not a port center. Not a financial center. Not many high-paying jobs. Nothing. It doesn’t even have many corporate headquarters when compared to many cities (US Airways, the worst airline in the country, is the only Fortune 500 company that calls Phoenix home). If you’re single and looking to meet someone, go elsewhere because Phoenix was ranked as one of the worst cities in the country for meeting other single people, especially those looking to get married. The city of Phoenix may be the 6th single-largest US city, in the nation’s 14th largest metro area, but Phoenix has nothing on metro areas that are even half its size. The Phoenix area is known for practically NOTHING and has no functional role whatsoever in our nation’s economy, which is sad, because most cities have some sort of identity or purpose. This makes Phoenix America’s largest “small town” or America’s largest suburb. And to prove it, Walmart is the Valley’s largest employer. Go figure. However it is a good place if you want to golf in the winter (and ONLY in the winter), hike, mountain bike or ski up in the mountains. Most people at urbandictionary who give thumbs down on negative definitions of Phoenix may be due to their heads being so stuck in the sand, that they haven’t realized the truth or haven’t even been to the coastal cities. If native Phoenicians don’t like it then may I suggest you try to change it? I moved here 3 years ago and will never poke fun of Chicago again. At least it is a major world city with world-class amenities and is everything Phoenix is not. Phoenix sucks! The people are not really very friendly either. They have almost a California mindset and not like what you would see in the Midwest or the South. Phoenicians, as its residents are called, generally have the worst personalities. They seem materialistic, introverted, egocentric, not very social, quiet and downright haughty or stuck up. Try going to Scottsdale. Most of the women there are stuck-up bitches where money, sex, materialism and sometimes partying are the only things that count in this life. The men are just as shallow and judge themselves by the size of their penis, the car they drive, the size of their house, how much money they make or how good looking their trophy wife is. Most Phoenicians are not just rotten people in their personal lives, but also AWFUL drivers on the road. If you don't believe me then drive in Phoenix or on I-17 or anywhere in the state. People don’t use their turn signal, they speed, drive wrecklessly, run red lights, tailgate, cut you off, flick you off, and Phoenix has numerous accidents everyday. Phoenix ranked as the worst city for auto accidents and was the number one city in all those things. Also, if your car breaks down or stalls on any road, drivers will scream at you or flick you off for causing a two-second inconvenience for them. They are not likely to stop and help you. And don't even get me started about the weather. Despite conventional wisdom of this Sonoran Desert urban hell, Phoenix does NOT have a tollerable climate in general. It is over 100 degress for 8 months, but the remaining months between NOV and end of FEB are good. Do you consider 115-degrees tollerable, let alone for eight months at a time? I didn't think so. Phoenix has an awfull drug problem, mostly from Meth being smuggled in from Mexico and the illegal immigrants that Phoenix tollerates. The city is a sanctuary city for illegal immigrants and it shows: violence, drugs everywhere, raids for illegal immigrants in a normally quite, suburban neighborhood and awfull traffic, because most of its Mexicans can't drive worth a dam, including the people who actually live there and belong there.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
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"Turtle on my name". A tribute to the 50 odd years of misheard lyrics.
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up ya bum
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