Number 16: The Chicago Running Man
You'd never expect this sexy ass mf Cryptid to grace your baby shower. The Chicago Running Man spans multiple mythos, but is most popular in American folklore. Legend has it, he holds the current land speed record at 784 lbs. and 19 cents. The Chicago Running Man will primarily use his knees to concuss his prey, which usually consists of Chicago Cubs. He especially loves the draft roster; they are a delicacy to him. The Chicago Running Man has escaped Foundation containment a record 48 times, and is currently on the loose. Some say, that if you play reggaeton loud enough, and at the right speed, you may be able to create frequencies that can slow down the Chicago Running Man enough to be seen with the naked eye, but be warned: it gets him particularly frisky and handsy. If you survive the encounter, you may experience a slight intense burning of the ass cheek, and handprint-shaped bruising along the ass cheek area. The Chicago Running Man, like all good Americans, is devoted to FREEDOM. Sometimes, in his spare time, he runs over to Socialist rallies and throws a bike lock, and often pins it on an ANTIFA member. The goal of this is unknown, but he has been found consistently doing this. The Chicago Running Man has a soft spot for crap-quality early 2000's YouTube video intros, as he discovered himself spiritually around the those times. More has yet to be discovered about this phenomenal creature; expect more reports in the future.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
fuck you and your mugs give me a shirt or ill shit on you
Love love love it! Customer service gave me a coupon, let me know that I had to revise the definition when too long, and overall super helpful.
Nice Mug my second Mug. A little staining or photo graphic stain on the side of the cup and shown in the picture. As a result I cannot give a 5 Star Review.
The snarky message on the mug always gets big laughs from guests so I'm now using it as my go-to bourbon glass
Love the coffee mug. Would have been nice to see who had the word accepted into Urban Dictionary printed on the bottom of the mug. As I was the one. "Dusty Dawg" Other than that I love.
fuck ur mugs i want one for free
This mug, much like a cursed relic unearthed from the depths of despair, embodies a cacophony of design flaws and manufacturing mishaps that make one wonder if it was birthed from the darkest corners of incompetence itself. From its deceptively promising exterior, which boasts a color scheme akin to a bruised banana left out in the sun for too long, to its handle that feels more like a medieval torture device designed to punish the unsuspecting hand that dares to grasp it, every aspect of this mug screams "regret." Its material, a sinister amalgamation of recycled nightmares and shattered dreams, leeches a flavor reminiscent of stale coffee mixed with the tears of disappointed souls into whatever liquid unfortunate enough to be poured within its cursed confines. The rim, jagged and uneven like the edge of a poorly forged blade, guarantees that each sip is a perilous journey fraught with the risk of lip lacerations and existential dread. And let us not forget the bottom of this vessel, where the manufacturer's logo is stamped with all the subtlety of a scarlet letter, branding the user as a victim of their own poor purchasing decisions for all eternity. Indeed, this mug serves as a stark reminder that sometimes, in the vast expanse of consumer goods, there exists a dark abyss where quality and utility fear to tread, leaving only disappointment and regret in their wake.
I think it’s funny and the quality is really good. Shipping was pretty fast too.
Arrived exactly on time( as projected) ;( beautiful blue color 💙 as specified) loving it ! ❤️
Loved the mug! It really suits me, my co-workers love it.
Pissah!
nice.
Sent this to my crush now she has a restraining order on me!!!
Without this mug, my life was but a series of painful unfortunate events. Since it has come into my life, love has followed, joy has followed and dishonour has been disavowed. Sincerely. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Please keep up the good work and I hope everyone will find joy as I have one day.
I love the Duh Big Red Truck so much that I have a tattoo. So does my best friend. We’re in our 60s. Woot woot!
my mom (Mia) loves the mug you made it is amazing you made her day #girlboss
I love da gooning mug. now i know how to goon and i can goon with my cool new gooner friends !
We really like our cup!!!
Just as described. Excellent packaging. Timely shipping. No problems here. Thanks!
Just wish it could have had a little more of the text on the mug, but otherwise it's great. What a clever marketing idea to be able to get this on t-shirts and mugs.
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