New Canaan

You know you live in New Canaan when... You can’t walk around any of the schools without seeing at least 3 Rugby shirts Everyone even the guys know all the names of the people from the OC Your next door neighbor gets arrested for dealing cocaine You’re scared to go to Norwalk because you think you going to get shot The only time you would ever think of going to the Bronx is to go to the Bronx Zoo Starbucks coffee is inexpensive to you Even some of the guys wear some from of Ugg shoes A Rams bumper sticker is plastered on every Land Rover You still think its summer so you wear flip flops in December Sports are not a game its life When you turn 16 you want a Land Rover and you expect to get one Birkenstocks aren’t for old people they’re for the teenagers When you talk about the moose the only thing you relate it to is Abercrombie When you can’t count the number of Hummers, Porsches, and Land Rovers in the streets on one hand Half the people aren’t who they really are Even though every mom is blonde and big boobed, you know it's all fake Perfection isn’t expected its reality A 12 year old could pass for a 21 year old and get alcohol The police are always showing up at the school for stupid small crimes created by the students When almost half of the population hates living here But we are still able to look like rich and perfect people screw that none of it's true