netter

a professional, normally a lawyer, who strives to bring in business by the droves following business development seminars forced on them by evil bosses who think they have nothing better to do with their Saturdays. Netters can be characterized by their inability to feel used, and enthusiastic go-getter attitudes at dorky conferences where potential victims convene. Netters are distinguished from prostitutes only by the fact that they wear suits, have business cards, and are normally so unattractive that even lonely dorky conference attenders who've heavily profited from the open bar wouldn't, quote, "hit that up if they paid me." However, in an ironic twist, some of these attendees have actually later paid quite willingly when served within 24 hours of meeting said netter. Unlike rainmakers or networkers, netters lack real charm and are also tasked with actually having to work on the cases they bring in, usually resulting in a dull empty feeling on the part of the client that they have, indeed, been "nettered." However, such a feeling will be relieved when client receives annual fruit basket from the firm. The international symbol of the netter is a shepherd's crook, crossed with a "Hello my name is ____" badge.