Mello
Mello, birth name being Mihael Keehl, is a character in the anime and manga, Death Note. He's almost always eating chocolate and wearing black leather. Why he wears leather is beyond me. From personal experience, I find that it leaves me sweaty and uncomfortable while wearing leather. But whatever, I guess. I read somewhere that it's Mello's way of soliciting for gay sex, which I tend to believe. Onto the story… After being told by Roger (a massive douche) that L had been killed by Kira (Light bulb Imagay), Mello promptly threw a hissy fit. He had to force himself to calm down and stop stomping on Near's puzzle to ask who L had chosen as a successor. When he was told that L had decided to be a lazy slacker and not choose ANY of the Wammy children to be his successor, Mello went batshit insane and joined the mafia. In order to gain ranks in the mafia, he had to become the mafia boss's whore and take it up the ass quite often. Mello inherited the Mr. Badass Mafia Boss's position when said Mafia boss's penis disintegrated inexplicably. To save himself embarrassment and shame, he left his mafia-related responsibilities in Mello's incompetent hands and fled to Holland. A few important things about Mello: He is always PMSing and eating mass amounts of chocolate. Yeah, like...always. His father was Willy Wonka, which makes Willy Wonka a deadbeat dad. Mello’s father failed to provide for his son. Why the fuck else would Mello be in an orphanage? I'll tell you why. Just after Mello's third birthday, Willy Wonka was taken into rehab for his chocolate addiction. Just as he was on the road to recovery, he relapsed and died. Unfortunately, Mello inherited his father's life-threatening addiction, which eventually proved to be the blond hellion's demise. Matt (Mail Jeevas, a.k.a., Mello's fuck buddy) would have been devastated because of Mello’s death, had he not been distracted by Fallout 3, or dead himself. Mello will forever live on in the hearts of the few people who actually cared for him. Not a lot of people did, to be honest. Mello was prone to random bouts of rage, which probably stems from his feelings of anger toward his father for allowing himself to be trapped in the clutches of addiction, and passing that addiction onto his son. Even though Mello was disliked by many, Near even outdid him on that. Everyone hates Near. Fuckin' Near. -_- Arrogant asshole.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
Love the coffee mug. Would have been nice to see who had the word accepted into Urban Dictionary printed on the bottom of the mug. As I was the one. "Dusty Dawg" Other than that I love.
fuck ur mugs i want one for free
This mug, much like a cursed relic unearthed from the depths of despair, embodies a cacophony of design flaws and manufacturing mishaps that make one wonder if it was birthed from the darkest corners of incompetence itself. From its deceptively promising exterior, which boasts a color scheme akin to a bruised banana left out in the sun for too long, to its handle that feels more like a medieval torture device designed to punish the unsuspecting hand that dares to grasp it, every aspect of this mug screams "regret." Its material, a sinister amalgamation of recycled nightmares and shattered dreams, leeches a flavor reminiscent of stale coffee mixed with the tears of disappointed souls into whatever liquid unfortunate enough to be poured within its cursed confines. The rim, jagged and uneven like the edge of a poorly forged blade, guarantees that each sip is a perilous journey fraught with the risk of lip lacerations and existential dread. And let us not forget the bottom of this vessel, where the manufacturer's logo is stamped with all the subtlety of a scarlet letter, branding the user as a victim of their own poor purchasing decisions for all eternity. Indeed, this mug serves as a stark reminder that sometimes, in the vast expanse of consumer goods, there exists a dark abyss where quality and utility fear to tread, leaving only disappointment and regret in their wake.
I think it’s funny and the quality is really good. Shipping was pretty fast too.
Arrived exactly on time( as projected) ;( beautiful blue color 💙 as specified) loving it ! ❤️
Loved the mug! It really suits me, my co-workers love it.
Pissah!
nice.
Sent this to my crush now she has a restraining order on me!!!
Without this mug, my life was but a series of painful unfortunate events. Since it has come into my life, love has followed, joy has followed and dishonour has been disavowed. Sincerely. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Please keep up the good work and I hope everyone will find joy as I have one day.
I love the Duh Big Red Truck so much that I have a tattoo. So does my best friend. We’re in our 60s. Woot woot!
my mom (Mia) loves the mug you made it is amazing you made her day #girlboss
I love da gooning mug. now i know how to goon and i can goon with my cool new gooner friends !
We really like our cup!!!
Just as described. Excellent packaging. Timely shipping. No problems here. Thanks!
Just wish it could have had a little more of the text on the mug, but otherwise it's great. What a clever marketing idea to be able to get this on t-shirts and mugs.
I spent the money and directly sent this to be the pettest person ever to a person who was doing this to me. It was awesome
It’s a sturdy ceramic mug. A little pricey, IMO, but I really wanted this definition on a mug. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Just what is needed for someone’s desk during the pandemic and beyond when they have to “MacGuyver” to make things happen.
Best purchase of my life, it's all downhill from here!
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