Malta Mug
Some island in the Mediterrenean. Consists of 3 smaller islands, Malta, Gozo and Comino (that's why they call it an archipelago really). Malta is densley populated (imagine 400,000 citizens living in your back garden), is visited by old retired pensionants who are really desperate to spend all their money in some five star hotel with a crappy service. Out of 10 people picked out at random, 9 of them go to church every day...while the other one practically lives in church. Far too sunny, a sea that smells, "modified" cars i.e.some speaker and a metal sheet molded and crafted to form a spoiler and some side skirts. Maltese speak some language stolen from the Arabs. Once in Malta you will regularly meet a new strange human species, the "sendikajr" they call it. These are just extreme nosy parkers whose only job is to know what are the neighbours doing. The most social area in Malta is the "super"market, where they sell food..sort of.... Here the "sendikajr" shares the news aquired during the previous day, such as how much times did Mary go to the toilet, when did she shower, when she slept with Ganni the butcher etc etc. Also, here news get amazingly modified to suit the sendikajr's pleasures. Clubs in Malta suck. Such that teens say they have fun listening the songs of some amateur DJ during the weekend. They just stand there doing nothing except nod with their head with the beat of the music....DUM DUM DUM, ZRINZ ZRINZ ZRINZ etc. On the Maltese roads, US astronouts test their boogy moon vehicles. They produce the same effect due to the disgraceful state of the streets. The government workers (known in Malta as "tal-gvern") are amazingly inefficient. They do nothing properly, they walk slow, and eat a lot while at work. It's some sort of addictiveness I guess. To fix some small pot hole, 15 government workers are needed, with the difference that only 2 of them do the job while the rest sit down on some bench eating sandwiches. The problem is that a pot hole is changed into a small hill by these workers. Education in Malta sucks due to the fact that Malta is so small that there isn't enough work for graduated students. So the ministry of education had the genial idea to harden every exam. This turned out to be very effective, since suicide rate increased and mortuaries had to employ more workers. It sucks at the point that there are only 2 political parties, Nationalist and Labour Party and a smaller one known in Malta as the Green Party. The Labour party has been in opposition since ages ago due to the fact that it was overthrown off power since it sucked bad. A large amount of rest-of-the-world-banned trees that cause asthma are exibited in Malta and produce lovely red, pink and white flowers. Churches can be found in the same amount of McDonalds in New York and are very strict. Public Transport is the worst i have ever met. Remember the old Leyland buses? They still use them in Malta. Then there is the only ship company to travel between Malta and Gozo. They thank you for using their company (called Gozo Channel) before each voyage during an announcement. The pun is that it's the only ship company, so as long as you don't decide to swim it, they have nothing to thank you for. Highly cultured, well uneducated, boring and entertaining to old tourists, Malta bears the honor of never loosing a battle, maybe a proof of the citizens' stubborness.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
This mug is wonderful it’s so funny and I gave it to the kid that made the Definition and he started dying laughing
War. War Never Changes. War, war never changes. In the year 1945, my great-great grandfather, serving in the army, wondered when he get to go home to his wife and the son he never see. He got his wish, when the U.S. ended WWII by dropping an atomic cloud on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The world awaited Armageddon, instead, something miraculous happened. We began to use atomic energy as a nearly limitless source of power. People enjoyed luxury once thought in the realm of science fiction. Domestic robots, fusion powered cars, portable computers. Then, in the 21st century, people awoke from the American dream. Years of consumption led to the shortages of every major resource. The entire world unraveled. Peace became a distant memory. It is now the year 2077, and we stand on the brink of total war, and I am afraid, for myself, for my wife, for my infant son, because if my time in the army taught me one thing; is that war, war never changes.
Excellent satire - didn't see comments to that end, so find it hard to fathom if most readers, in turn, didn't laugh out loud, and say so. But apparently not.
I am gonna buy it and give it to my nine year old brother
Super Funny Mug 😂
best mug ever spittin nothin but fax
i fucking hate your mugs and shirts
awesome product!
This mug made me to from a Level 1 Crook to Level 100 Mafia Boss instantly. I ascended to the heavens above when it came to the door and God himself told me "your a boss now cuh" and i descended feeling very powerful. Next thing I knew everyone loved me. However 4/5 stars because now I have too many fans and one is holding me hostage.... help
The mug is awesome, the yellow color is great but green is also good, the scream mug is the best mug in my entyre live!!! I can't imagine my life without this mug, i cant stop buing it.... I have like 30 mugs every color in this site and also i'm ordered a new one, please help me.
It is amazing I was having a bad day and I read this. My name is Evan and this made me happy
This mug made me horny.
looks perfect!!! we loved it
I ordered 4 of your mugs -- and have received 3; hopefully, the 4th is on its way! So far, I've received "fame," "620," and "$" ... only needing "hulo." ...It might be a matter of me being patient, that the 4th mug is on its way. However, the 3 received SO far are all EXCEPTIONAL, in every way!!! Mark Moilanen
I love this mug with a burning passion in my heart, I have purchased 7 of these mugs and intend to continue. This mug has changed my life for the better
it's the best mug of the world !!!!!
wow! this mug is so thoughtful to giving to my wife!
The description tells nothing but facts. 5 stars instant
Your description is right on, except in 1989 I named my daughter Kallen Mikel (www.kallenmikel.com/original-art). I thought I made up the name, but apparently, it originated as a boy's name in Greek and Hebrew. I first found this out in 2001 when I was traveling to Finland. In the 'tube food' section in a big Finnish supermarket there it was, a royal blue tube of salmon paste with a blonde-haired boy named Kallen! So now I have discovered that there are many Kallen's of both sexes. I want to buy her a cup, but it has 'him' on it. Is there any way you can make that a unisex description for both sexes? Just askin'. Being a Barbara (Barbs) myself ... a 'cake eater' from Edina, MN I had to ask ... haha ;-)
Thank you for the mug. It arrived fast and exceeded my expectations.
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