Jizzlam
A loosely codified lifestyle that focuses on effective, ethical, ritualistic masturbation and sex. It could be interpreted as a religion. Developed by a Grand Master Baiter known as Sigma Card as he’s spent thousands of hours chronically gooning to keep his mind clear. Holy texts include a bunch of bizarre sex fanfictions (A sort of goon bible if you will) written in Minecraft servers, porn memes, images shared from e622, definitions on Urban Dictionary, and sex memes. There’s an oral law called the Jelqmud that only goonabbis can interpret. Commandments of Jizzlam: -Thou shalt not munt. -Don’t goon or eat the cum of anyone besides your Jerkmate. -You may goon competitively any time but you cannot nut in November. -Do not waste your cum, if you’re going to spill seed then save it in a jar for future use such as a sperm bank deposit or an ingredient in cheese. -Do not goon the uncircumcised or with men who can’t get hard.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
The most coolest I own!
Cole m's girlfriend loved this mug we have an uncontrollable love for eachother

Easy to order and packaged well!!
It's an amazing product!
The mug is a lot of fun and arrived as promised! Thank you
Just what we ordered, arrived in perfect condition, arrived on time! Excellent!
So fun! Looks just like I expected. I like that I could edit the mug to say what I want.
got one for Cole M.'s mother, she loved it! Best mediocrely- timed sex ever!!!
The mug is beautiful and I love it! Thank you for having a handle large enough for a man to hold onto! ♥️
Mug printed nicely. Great gift idea.
Really great! Your custom mugs are amazing and hilarious
lit af my name is Frey and the def isnt true but its so great
Cole M. got me one for my birthday, fastest sex ever
Cole M. got this for me. best sex of my life.
Got it for Cole M. girlfriend. Slowest sex of my life.
Fucking awesome. Bought this while drunk and don't regret it.
Cole M. gifted one for me on my birthday. I will never forget that day. 10/10
I didn’t get one yet but if I did it would also be for Cole M.’s girlfriend, we would have amazing sex
Was a gift and arrived on time. Just as advertised. Lots of fun.
The price is a little bit expensive, but the gift arrived as ordered. Thanks!
Review Details
Pro Customization
Create unique products with your own words and definitions
Live Preview
Personalize Your Design
Debug: Product Metadata
| Key | Value (click to copy) |
|---|---|
Copied! | copiedKey = null, 1500);
"> |
Return Policy
Made Just For You
Each product is custom-printed with your unique text, making it truly one-of-a-kind.
Defect-Free Guarantee
If your product arrives with printing defects, damage, or quality issues, we'll send you a free replacement.
Custom Orders
Due to the personalized nature of your order, we don't accept returns for change of mind or sizing issues.
Questions about your order? Contact our support team for assistance.