jesus
A bastard carpenter who was constantly followed by a group of stoners convinced that he was the son of god. He was born the son of a prostitute (stage name: 'The Virgin Mary') and one of a trio of kings who were present at his birth (the impregnation a result of a failed condom during an orgy involving said trio and prostitute) offering child support in the form of gifts so as not to arouse the suspicion of the husband (he was not aware of his wife's 'other' occupation). Jesus (pronounced "ho-zay" but interpreted as "Jee-zus" because the bloody English can't do anything right) would take up carpentry as his trade years later after an incident where he was lost in a dessert for a great many years and failed to pass in his admission essay for law-school by the due date. It was at this time that the druggies appeared into his life, lazily hanging out in the alley next to Jesus' workshop. The exact reason for being dubbed the son of god is still debated by scholars but it is rumored that it had something to do with a neck injury Jesus had sustained, resulting in his wearing of a halo neck brace for a month or so. In approximately 35 AD (Time Paradox?), Jesus was convicted of being a cannibal and vampire after a dinner party at which he supposedly served blood-wine and people-bread. He was crucified and stabbed with a spear (overkill) by a group of hateful Jews. He was resurrected, however, by by a combination of necromancy and T-virusmancy as a zombie. A great many people died by his hands and he went uncontested for many years (he is credited with the Black Death) until a group of religious fanatics lead by L. DaVinci captured and deported him to Mexico. There he lives today, running rampant and sating his bloodlust by killing goats under the alias 'El Chupacabra'.
The Urban Dictionary Mug
The mug exceeded my expectations. Really excellent quality and build
Jim, you’re a fucking idiot interfering with accurate ratings and legitimate feedback. Get a hobby.
Great gift!
A little spendy, but worth it.
My wife kept talking about "ways out" being a Denver version of "psych" and she was right, so I got her this once I found it on UD. She loved it!
It's a great mug, will reccomend to family members my grandma gave me this mug for christmas and it was by far the best gift i got.
It arrived three weeks after ordering but given the holiday rush and inability of shipping to keep on schedule arrived late but was perfect little gift from me to my wife for her morning coffee with her "nickname" on the mug.
I liked the photo on your website and so I ordered the mug. You sent it right away, and it looks great!
Arrived carefully packaged
me and the boys when i get vodka mug
I ordered 3 of your mugs, with different names on them. There was a typo in the information about the name on the back of each of the mugs. This wasn’t a dealbreaker because the people who received them liked them. However, it would be nice if somebody who has basic proficiency in spelling English words could proofread the script for all of your names before they’re prepared.
Arrived on time. Great packaging. Communication with vendor was top-notch. High quality item.
I love it! Thanks! So
Great present for a retiring colleague with custom saying she's known for!
Loved this mug! So unique and you can edit the text to add something unique.
I gave it to my friend who took money from me and never returned.
I love the fact that I was able to customize my name since I've never been able to find anything with my name. The only downside is it's smaller than I thought it would be (I guess I didn't pay much attention to that), wish it was bigger, only about 10 oz total.
It's simply awesome; and plus, the word means a lot.
Really fast and looks great! Took a chance on Christmas gift and it was a success!
Awesome mug feels really nice good weight and color although I think the shade could be a little brighter when it comes to the highlighter yellow, I am still pleased with the outcome and the fact that a whole passage was so neatly printed onto the product, very pleased with the packaging too! That made it so easy to wrap just in time for Christmas. Who knew!!
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