jargon jerker
The official term is docuphilia, used to describe a person who is sexual aroused by legal terms and their associated pleonasms. Docuphiliacs or jargon jerkers are known to deviously hoard credit card contracts, legal disclaimers, copyright notices, government signs, and other legal documents, forms & contracts for subsequent and sometimes daily arousal. Docuphilia is a rare disorder having no allegiance to occupation, race, sex, gender, political orientation or creed. (It is a common misconception that most lawyers are docuphiliacs and vice versa.) There is no way to determine whom is a docuphiliac besides recognizing the following symptoms: i . Excessive maundering and confusion while in the presence of “desirable” legal documents. ii. Meager but frequent attempts to view a legal document in solitude. WARNING: Agitated docuphiliacs may resort to violence to obtain a desirable document. The docuphiliac may use occupational related excuses in order to achieve this. (Example: I'd better bring this to the boss/I'll read this over for you.) Veteran docuphiliacs express no shame in these blatant attempts. Upon his/her untimely return the docuphiliac will honor the terms of the excuse but often very poorly. Beware. iii. An excessive collection of framed legal documents and other nicely worded texts throughout the docuphiliacs office. iv. Hours of satisfaction in fantasizing about word cells to generate new words. v. Meticulous aversion to informal slang. Which is deemed “undesirable” and “unattractive” by docuphiliacs. (Not necessarily because of it’s improperness.) One may hear "YES!" "OH YEAH!" "DAMN!" etc orgasmicly exclaimed from your company's paper recycling center or Xerox room if a co-worker is a jargon jerker. Where docuphiliacs are known to search for documents out of desperation. Until recently docuphiliacs acted individually solely for their own personal leisure, however the docuphilial elite have orchestrated a number of seemingly unrelated lawsuits to induce the literate population into this esoteric disorder. The lawsuits’ modus operandi includes suing large corporations for very frivolous purposes including: becoming obese after eating their food, getting burned after spilling coffee on themselves, etc. The single motive of these lawsuits of course is to force the company to include a legal disclaimer on their product. If the docuphiliacs continue to proliferate and broaden their beliefs everything ever written will be in legal terms and in their eyes, the docuphiliacs will conquer the world. A growing number of conspiracies maintain that the government is aware of the docuphilial elite and their sinister motives. They claim, that the government is attempting to crush the movement it by stalling FOIA requests, censoring desirable documents and lessening public involvement with legislation. DISCLAIMER: You (the reader) agree that by asserting this transmission as true; you fully and willingly acknowledge that you are: 1) A total moron. In rare instances (Example: Cigarette warnings, pharmaceutical warnings, etc.) legal disclaimers are necessary to protect the population from serfdom. To distinguish docuphilial legislation/lawsuits from a necessary one ask yourself: Does this label caution one of true hazards or simply demonstrate how foolish one can be?
The Urban Dictionary Mug
What a sexy ass mug ヾ(*’Ｏ’*)/
My daughter is a Seinfeld afficianato. She was pleasantly surprised when she opened the package with her Penske File mug. It has the definition of Penske File from the Urban dictionary. Totally worth the price!
gay mug very spicy
The Urban Dictionary is a unique place to find anecdotal memories on all sorts of stuff. Their ongoing communication once your order is placed is excellent. I have put in a significant number of orders recently, and the communication regarding my order status is excellent. I have had one order misplaced in transit. They have contacted me to say that they will get back to me, but to this point, they have not. So, that's a bit of a caveat in my rating. Overall, I would rate their products and customer service as good. I would not hesitate to deal with them in the future. Fill Your Boots with Whatever You Want to Order. Nice job, "Urban Dictionary."
Thank you for sharing this Unique piece of Artwork. You are the only one that offered this. Thank you for the quality service you have provided not only in what you offer but right on to the quality packaging as well. Thanks again - Peggy Hall
My brother Tom became an uncle & urban dictionary created a wonderful uncle Tom mug…
It is special to have a mug that has to do with my dad who invented a word when we were growing up. He passed away last year. Drinking from this mug is like spending time with him.
Quick turnaround time and good quality merchandise.
very cool kanye for me gave it to my crush and now were dating so yea
I bought a Prone mug and i love it its so good imma prone to the bathroom now brb
This mug gives my life purpose. It's what I've always said. Patience is a virtue and hard work never betrays. Ever since I was born I've been struck with one misfortune after another, but today it all paid off. I got my own mug, and I use it anywhere and whenever I can! Both of my legs are shattered because to my wife threw me in the middle of traffic and my windpipe is messed up due to me screaming all the way from the crash site to the hospital thanks to the unbearable pain I was feeling. Although even with all that's happened this is still the best day of my life. I suppose the only problem I have is that whenever I happen to look at my cup I get a little too happy. That causes problems because my life support can't handle my exhilaration, haha! I'm just kidding; that was just a little lighthearted joke of mine. I actually cannot afford life support because I spent all of my life savings on this fine piece of pottery. Not to worry though! I can get through the pain with my will and drugs - I mean medication. P.S. There are definitely no ghosts in the mugs. Just wanted to point that out in case someone was worried about that.
I bought two mugs as gifts for coworkers and they were very pleased. The print was clear and concise. Hopefully they last a long time.
Ordered a gift for a friend I hope he likes it :)
Mug was well-packed when received. Shipping was timely. The mug was as advertised. Very nice.
BEST THING EVER. CUZ YK WHAT!!?!? IT. IS. A. MUG. WITH MY NAME. AND. A COOL DESCRIPTION. ON. IT. I LOVE IT.
Just what I expected! Thank you!
I bought this friggin thing thinking my whole life would change. Guess what? It still sucks! If this friggin thing can't change my life then I don't want it!
This is a great gift to give after our Urban Dictionary inclusion
It's perfect!! Thank you!
My Name is Walter Hardwell White, My Mug was sent to 308 Negra Aroyal Lane, AQ, New Mexico and arrived on-time and I am very satisfied. My "Glock Dookie" mug is great for my lab work, and my friend Pinkman loves it!
Review Details
Pro Customization
Create unique products with your own words and definitions
Live Preview
Personalize Your Design
Debug: Product Metadata
| Key | Value (click to copy) |
|---|---|
Copied! |
Return Policy
Made Just For You
Each product is custom-printed with your unique text, making it truly one-of-a-kind.
Defect-Free Guarantee
If your product arrives with printing defects, damage, or quality issues, we'll send you a free replacement.
Custom Orders
Due to the personalized nature of your order, we don't accept returns for change of mind or sizing issues.
Questions about your order? Contact our support team for assistance.