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Jared

Once a lost and troubled soul trapped in the fourth underworld, Jared became a God to the Aztecs when mysterious life forms descended to Mictlan seeking an ancient rumored power. The citizens of Planet Z spent years traveling through different dimensions only to discover what they sought was not to be found - but created. Jared was chosen by the leader of Z. A few indulgent meanderings and shots of whiskey later, the celestial alignment cast an electric surge between Cancer and Scorpio. The surge was so poignant, tightly bound and focused that Jared became the first being to have successful intercourse with an extraterrestrial, bridging the gap between Gods and Aliens by taking on the role of Daddy: God of The Impossibly Mindblowing Orgasm. The Z leader surrendered to Jared as an object of pleasure for all eternity as an expression of gratitude for helping to create the ultimate sexual energy. Although Jared is immortal, his human form is a specimen of perfection, sexuality and divine masculinity. His generously proportioned reproductive organ was hand sculpted by Zeus with perfection in the style of a male Venus de Milo. Jared excels in all things delicious, and even his humanly procreative fluids are indicated by legend to have an intoxicating flavor as well as healing powers and a magical, iridescent glow.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Ceramic mug (11 oz)
Printed on-demand just for you
Dishwasher safe
Microwave safe
Word on front, definition on back
Comfortable handle
Every order personally reviewed
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15

amazing I will buy this. it will be my child. I WILL BE KING OF THE 0w0

0w0 kingJun 20

I loved this mug! when i drink out of it it always has a horrible stench and honestly i dont mind because i love smelling it. my boyfriend thinks i should throw it away because he says "its has lead poisoning" but i cant get rid of it. when my mom died i bought her a mug that said "deceased" because i thought it would brighten the moment when i open presents at her funeral (it worked). but if your looking for something to buy, you should really get one of these mugs. they are cute, nerdy, and remind me of my dead mother!

Oliver N.Jun 19

Yay. I got a mug... And it has the most accurate definition of my name ever lmfao. The quality is great and it's totally worth the price. For me, at least :)

Zaira Z.Jun 19

The accuracy is real! My husband and I have 3 daughters. Our last name is Staats, in UD was spot on! Unbelievable! I got it to my husband just in time for Father's Day! Lol!

Verona S.Jun 19
✓ Verified Purchase

love it sm, gives a clear understanding of the word every sip thankyou

Pat P.Jun 19

I nutted in the mug. Loved it!!!!!!!!

me .Jun 18

I fucked this mug so hard, It became pregnant

Indy R.Jun 18
Review by Jansen P.

Exactly as I ordered it. Shipping was perfect, got updates, accurate date of delivery, and no damage. This is a gift for my little brother.

Jansen P.Jun 17
✓ Verified Purchase

i was put on a list for buying this mug. 10/10 would recommend

parkzer g.Jun 16

Great customer service and was a fun surprise for an inside joke to a coworker. 😊

Tera S.Jun 16
✓ Verified Purchase

Nice cup! Seems to be a quality piece.

Cynthia P.Jun 16
✓ Verified Purchase

This mug reminds me of when I was happy. When I was a wee little winker enjoying the wonders of this life!

JzuezJun 15

The, "Wenomechainsama" Mug has amazing quality and an amazing definition! Can't belive my child's generation is so funny! Love - Sharen, 55, On facebook !<3

Sharen K.Jun 15

this mug reminds me of my cat, it does nothing and cant pour me a nice cup of joe. It is horrible, it doesn't tell nor does it allow me sip on it. It stops me from drinking from it, its like the mug is trying to torture me.

ben m.Jun 14

love this mug! Goes perfect with the Morbius meal.

Quandale D.Jun 12
Review by Blade A.

Had no idea my name had a definition!!

Blade A.Jun 12

Bought for an inside joke. Perfect.

Dale F.Jun 12
✓ Verified Purchase

i love the schizophrenia mug its amazing

e w.Jun 9

This cute mug reminded me of a quote from an obscure biography I found quite by accident in a tiny hole-in-the-wall 2nd hand shop in Portland, ME in 1987: 'The Life and Times of Lazarus of Bethany'. Quote: " We are all walking wounded held together by the scars of our forbearance and the charity of our sisters and brothers." Truer words have never been said.

LASZLO B.Jun 9

Love it . Its me down to a T

Craig F.Jun 7

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